The secret to good conversation.
If someone ever asked me the question: “What do you think is a great skill to have?”, my go-to answer would always be the same- “conversation”. From a young age, I’ve always realised the importance of being able to have the right kind of conversations. Even if you can’t fluently speak a language, the ability to know what you’re talking about, and conveying an idea, can go a long way.
Don’t make it a task.
As a kid, I was never one to take pride in knowing “big words”, but one thing I would always be proud of was knowing how to keep somebody engaged. Essentially, the conversation is communication, the sharing of ideas. You talk to learn, and to share. When you want to communicate something effectively, your best course of action would be to be natural and relax. To put it bluntly, don’t force yourself(or the other person/people, but that’s an article for another day).
Don’t overthink it.
The conversation is the EASIEST thing there can be. You need to remember that you can always choose to be on the front foot. If you want to talk about something, in particular, talk about it. If you don’t think you know enough about that topic, listen and learn. It’ll do you a world of good. A lot of people think that talking more than the other person makes you look like the smartest person in the room. Trust me, it doesn't. Conversations are the best way for you to learn about anything, it’s the real-life equivalent of sharing XP points in video games(if that was a thing)
The actual secret?
I and a couple good friends of mine recently started a podcast(in lockdown, what a surprise) and it was by far one of the best decisions I’ve made. After putting out a few episodes, I asked myself what the biggest factor was in the depth of our conversations.
This finally brings me to the much-awaited secret, the Holy Grail of conversation… you get the point. The secret to any good conversation is… FLOW.
The best part about the conversation is that there is absolutely no limit. You don’t find yourself restricted in the slightest. You could be talking about dogs, only to find yourself talking about that time you broke down knowing that Spiderman 4 is never coming out five minutes later. This is what I mean when I say “flow”. That subtle transition from one topic to another, it’s really effortless when you don’t overthink it.
The trick to having good conversations lies in the fact that it is a natural process. The conversation is meant to happen, it isn’t something that you force upon yourself. Talk, listen, rinse, repeat. That’s it, that’s the secret to good conversation.
