Thirty Things To Do After You Die — Chapter 9
A Brief History of Time
It’s easy to forget that telling the time was once a tricky business in Heaven. They’d always been able to remote-view into the mortal realm, of course, right from day one, but that only helps if there’s a mortal clock to view. And despite Adam and Steve and Eve being given a pretty good rolling start with God gifting them language, mathematics, the written word, religion, the wheel, knowledge of hunting, farming, fishing, cooking, astronomy, construction, law, trade, footwear, basic tailoring and lots of other handy hints and tips, humanity still took a millennium or two to get going when it came to telling the time. So to begin with, Heaven had to rely on its own methods.
The first was to use a camera obscura, which takes advantage of the sun’s movement in the sky. In Heaven, the sun is always overhead but varies in proximity through the course of twenty-four hours, at midday being at a similar distance to its distance from Earth, but at night receding to what new arrivals often mistake for the moon, but locals call the ‘manimoon’. To tell the time, all one has to do is step inside the obscura device, close the door, and read off where the sun’s disc hits the graduations marked on the floor, the graduations indicating the number of hours from midday. However, several problems exist. The first is it…
