How Communication Pauses Are a Source for New Interactive Possibilities
“No word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause,” Mark Twain
This article has been expanded from a recent version originally published in my Psychology Today Blog on October 1, 2024, and will be shared in my Substack newsletter.
I have been fascinated by how a simple pause during communication transforms relationships. This explains how our species has evolved by creating new possibilities and still does. Much unknown but not necessarily hidden information emerges from these liminal pauses. What arises creates new, unforeseen interpersonal dialogue. Most of my original training as a family therapist confirms this based on participating in and observing interactions. For myself, it continues to this day: learning and unlearning about what I describe as an “ecology of communication.”
Pausing is a main component of ecological communication (the whole is more than and connected to the sum of its parts), which seeks out and resolves conflicts. It also can be considered abductive reasoning, a space between deductive and inductive thinking that demonstrates a holistic perspective by its very position. In this liminal gap, much knowledge and information seemingly hidden during interpersonal communication can rise up to be heard…
