I Come Bearing Gifts Or I Come Empty Handed
Which one are you?
My Mum taught me that if someone invites you to their home for dinner or to stay for a few days, by virtue of politeness, you should always bring a gift to show respect and appreciation.
She said that in life, happy and healthy relationships are grounded in reciprocity. I have always followed her advice, because indeed, when someone gives you something, the least of things is to reciprocate.
But hey, this is my perspective and I know that not everyone might agree. I would even go so far as to say that when it comes to matters of relationships, I struggle with people who can’t demonstrate basic “give and take” skills or show generosity to others.
In my studies in cultural anthropology, I analyzed the concept of reciprocity. It turns out that it’s universal and is actually the genesis of our monetary system. People used to exchange stuff using a batter-based system before money existed.
In cultures all over the world, when someone gives you something, you give them something in return. So maybe I’m not that crazy after all. Reciprocity is the norm albeit the decent thing to do and many cultures echo that.
But what does it mean when people don’t reciprocate? Could it mean that they’re stingy, that they don’t value…
