The Real Reason You Never Get What You Think You Want

Goals are best achieved when the method and process aren’t cast in stone.

Jill Reid
Jill Reid
Nov 6, 2020 · 5 min read
girl with long dark hair wearing black dress floating in air above grassy lawn
girl with long dark hair wearing black dress floating in air above grassy lawn
Photo by Ashley Bean on Unsplash

I can hear the argument already:

“But wait, I know exactly what I want. And if I don’t mentally craft an image containing a level of detail that gets me excited when I think about it, how can I maintain the motivation to achieve it? After all, isn’t that why I spend so much time and effort picturing my future dreams and desires with such a high degree of sensory precision and accuracy?”

The answer is yes — but only to a point.

Because allowing our minds to focus on what’s important to us in the moment — right down to the last defining detail — has a drawback. By keeping the image static until some future time when our dreams unfold in sync, we often neglect to take the bigger picture into consideration.

Our individually prescripted futures seldom leave room for on-going change.

Yes, our thoughts can definitely influence our reality. But the reverse is also true. And when we begin constructing our goals from a personalized wish list, we’re not always aware of what potential outside influences may exist tomorrow, or next month, or next year.

Although you received what you thought you wanted, your perfect future arrived with a few unexpected consequences.

It could happen. Because while you were busy imagining your dream life, formulating the final picture in all its glory, you neglected to take into account the other possibilities that may exist outside your personal bubble of joy — the reality of situations and events beyond your control.

Being motivated is important.

But focusing that enthusiasm into blind obsession can rob you of the perspective and objectivity you need to see the overall, evolving picture.

Kind of takes the shiny edge off everything, doesn’t it?

So does this mean we should give up on transforming our hopes and dreams into a tangible, rewarding future? Is the possibility of unforeseeable events affecting the outcome of our objectives a reason to abandon our goals?

Developing our ideal lives is a continual work-in-progress.

And the more cognizant we are of external conditions and influences — especially those that can potentially derail our advancements — the more responsive we can be in changing, adjusting, and fine-tuning our efforts to ultimately achieve the final outcome.

The Take-Away

Striving to reach your goals works best when the method and process isn’t cast in stone. The more ways — and options — you have for moving forward with recognizable benchmarks, the greater the chance of arriving at your desired destination.

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Jill Reid

Written by

Jill Reid

Author of “Real Life” & “Discover Your Personal Truth” | Writing about life, relationships, happiness, health, & personal success — http://bit.ly/RealLifeBook

ILLUMINATION-Curated

Outstanding stories objectively and diligently selected by 40+ senior editors on ILLUMINATION

Jill Reid

Written by

Jill Reid

Author of “Real Life” & “Discover Your Personal Truth” | Writing about life, relationships, happiness, health, & personal success — http://bit.ly/RealLifeBook

ILLUMINATION-Curated

Outstanding stories objectively and diligently selected by 40+ senior editors on ILLUMINATION

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