My Near-Death Experience
And The Stranger Thing That Happened After It
I can still remember the moment that our car left the road and I saw only trees in front of us.
Against my better judgment, I had gotten into a car with my boyfriend who had consumed too much alcohol.
It was after midnight and no one saw the accident so it’s unclear how long we were unconscious in the car.
But, what I do remember is the feeling of being suspended in a column of white light and realizing with every cell in my body that I was dead. It was a deeply profound awareness. It was also the calmest, most peaceful feeling that I had ever experienced.
I remember looking up into the column of light and waiting. But, there was no anxiety, or panic associated with the waiting. I felt a kind of bliss and internal peace. There were no other feelings that we typically associate with waiting. In the moment, it was knowing that I had died, waiting for the next thing, and a joy that was felt by every molecule in my body.
Except I didn’t have a sense of having a body. If I had to describe it, I felt more like a cloud.
Most people would call this a near-death experience. But, my definition of death is the separation of the body and the soul or spirit. I feel as though my soul/spirit left my body. I was pure bliss. I knew that I had died but there was no fear, only perfect contentment.
I don’t know how long I stayed in this state and I don’t remember making a choice, but I do remember coming back into my body and waking up. I saw the mess around me. The shattered windshield, my friend still unconscious and slumped over, and blood flowing down my face and onto my clothes.
I tried to wake my friend but I couldn’t get him to respond. I knew that I had to get help so I climbed out of the car and walked back to the road. My shoes had fallen off so I walked barefoot through the snow. I don’t remember feeling cold.
A car was coming down the road and I stood in the street trying to get their attention. They slowed down and then sped off. I suppose that I looked frightening but I have always wondered if they regretted not stopping to help.
I continued walking along the road until I came to a house. I rang the doorbell and a couple of older adults answered. They looked shocked as I told them about the accident. I told them that my friend was still unconscious in the car. There was no hesitation. The woman said she would call for an ambulance and the man invited me to come into their home.
I thanked him but declined. I said I didn’t want to get blood on their carpet. This is the last thing I remember until I woke up in an ambulance. The EMT’s told me that my friend was in another ambulance and we were both on our way to the hospital.
When we arrived, the emergency room doctor pointed to another patient being brought in. He said he’s the first casualty of the Christmas holiday. That could have been you. He wanted to admit me but I told him that I didn’t have any health insurance. He said he would keep me and my friend in the ER until his shift was over the next day.
He put 87 stitches in my forehead and around my eyes. He asked me what I was doing with my life and why I was with this boyfriend. He made me promise to go back to college and get a new boyfriend. I honestly felt that it was a divine intervention and redirection for my life.
My boyfriend and I were released the following day and returned home. His parents brought food and flowers. They also brought his aunt who I had never met. We looked horrible and felt worse, and after a brief visit they left.
That night I woke up to the sound of the phone ringing. It seemed like the middle of the night and I couldn’t imagine why anyone would be calling. I nudged my boyfriend to get up and answer the phone in the hallway.
I heard him say hello and after listening to him speak I knew it was his aunt who had come to see us that day. I thought if she was calling us in the middle of the night, it must be something urgent. I kept straining to hear his words and I knew it was important.
He came back to bed and rolled over to go back to sleep. But, I needed to know the reason for her call. I nudged him again and asked him why his aunt had called us. He seemed confused. Again, I asked him what happened when he answered the phone.
He looked at me like I was crazy. He said he hadn’t answered the phone. The phone hadn’t rung. And he hadn’t talked with his aunt.
I couldn’t believe it. It was so real to me that I thought he must have been mistaken. Eventually, I went back to sleep.
The next day, his parents came over to tell us that his aunt had died during the night.
My boyfriend remembered our conversation during the night and we both felt shocked.
I believe that when his aunt died, she tried to contact us. I wish I knew what she wanted to tell him. But, I had a sense that she was saying the same thing that the emergency doctor had told me.
We had survived a horrible car accident. The car had been totaled. No one who saw the car believed that anyone could have survived the accident. But, we did. I felt that I had died but come back because it wasn’t time for me to cross over.
I have always felt that there’s a reason that I was allowed to stay in this body and continue to experience life here on earth. I believe that life is sacred and we only get to be here for a short time. Since the accident, I have felt thankful for what I consider my bonus years.
I’m now 72 years old and I love this life and this body that has served me so well. I even love my scars that remind me that I almost didn’t get to experience the joy and ecstasy of having children and grandchildren.
I don’t consider what I went through to be a “near-death” experience. I truly believe that I died and I came back. I think that because I had gone into a different realm in the white light that I was able to be aware of my friend’s aunt after she died and tried to contact us.
I have absolute faith that there is another existence after we leave our bodies. I believe in a loving and benevolent spirit/universe and I’m grateful to have been given more time here.
I believe that dying gave me a new appreciation for living.
Here’s the link that inspired this piece.
