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What Kind of Man Turns Down a Willing Woman?
The Other Side of Consent
A comment on one of my recent articles caught my attention. A young man expressed appreciation for my advice about letting friendship grow before deciding whether to explore a sexual connection.
The problem was, he said, sometimes women he went out with were ready for sex before he was.
Now, I can’t say I’ve wrestled with that problem. When I was that man’s age (half a lifetime back), I would have laughed at such a statement, maybe even asked him, “Are you bragging or complaining?”
Not that I have never turned down sex. But the times that I was propositioned and declined, I had reason to be leery, as the offers were from strangers or near-strangers, and I was pretty sure one of them wasn’t interested so much in me as in a place to sleep that wasn’t in her car. (She had some major issues, too, but holey moley she was hot.)
But I digress. The point is, now that women are stepping up and speaking out for what they want, and now that everybody knows that horny isn’t just a guy thing, we need to take another look at issues of consent.
Men may be the askers, but women are the choosers. They decide which men get lucky, which ones lose.
