25 Lessons I Learned Before Turning 25
and why I wouldn’t change anything.
I do not know how other people feel on their birthday. Quite frankly, I never paid much attention to my age. I constantly forget how old I am and when people ask me about my age, it takes me a hot minute to gather up my thoughts and respond accurately.
Reminiscing on my past decades, I can admit they went by so fast, but at times I feel like I went through a lot of experiences, while other times I feel like I know nothing.
Thus, I write this story more for myself because I did not prepare this list in advance, I want to freestyle and see where the flow takes me. I think it will be fun to look back at this after some time and see if I would add anything else.
I’ll get into it.
1. Get to know yourself
Nothing is more unbearable than getting through life without knowing yourself best. I don’t want to drag in here the typical cliche:
“THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IS YOU.”
No.
I’m talking about:
Accepting yourself.
It took me a lot of time to embrace many of my flaws. It took me a lot of time to understand what I need to work on myself and how to do it. If there’s something you know would make you feel better about yourself, do it. I know it’s not easy; it will take time, and you’ll face hardship and ups and downs, but it’s worth it.
Also, be realistic. It would be best if you didn’t change your life next Monday. You need to set “milestones”.
Finding out what you want.
Whether you want to pursue another career, buy a house or a car, start a family or move across the globe, it’s better to know now, than have regrets later.
2. Appreciate your parents.
Probably this won’t resonate with some, but you’re entitled to feel however you want.
Talking about myself, what I learned is that I need to be grateful for everything my parents had done for me.
Never take for granted what you already have.
3. Surround yourself with people who make you feel loved.
Don’t waste time on connections that don’t bring out the best in you. Letting go of something that doesn’t serve you will definitely give you enough space for your inner self to blossom.
4. Learn to put yourself first.
This was probably the hardest lesson I learned during the past four years. I still overthink whenever I say “No” to someone.
Prioritise yourself — doing yourself a favor should feel better than sacrificing your happiness for others.
5. Don’t feel bad when your opinion is different.
As an individual co-existing in a society, you are deeply influenced by people you either admire or trust.
However, this doesn’t mean you should stop thinking for yourself and take everything as it is presented by others.
6. Spend time alone.
Being comfortable alone and doing activities alone always makes me feel empowered—even the smallest things like working out alone or going for a walk or to the grocery store.
7. Be honest — to yourself and others.
Don’t sugarcoat your promises and don’t fool yourself. This is another trait I had to deal with after admitting I’m a people-pleaser.
Also, if you do this to avoid hurting someone, you will eventually hurt them or yourself.
8. Find your weaknesses.
Part of your growth is learning what you need to work on yourself. My weakness was caring about people’s opinions too much. I have put aside my welfare to make room for others’ comfort and that’s wrong.
9. Celebrate your accomplishments.
This is directed to my past self — I never celebrated properly any achievement I had worked so hard for. Now, when I look back I realise how much effort, time, sleepless nights, and tears I consumed working towards my goals. And for what? When I got to where I wanted, I just asked myself…
“Ok, what’s next?”
Take a moment to think of all the things you have now, you once dreamed of and worked for.
10. Be curious about others’ points of view.
I noticed once I grew up, I matured enough to listen to others speaking even though I did not agree with them. I like to dive into their belief system without being hostile.
Only after I have my whole picture of what they mean, that’s when I can conclude when I’m right or not. Also, I learned so many new things from doing this.
11. Don’t argue pointlessly.
This was probably one of the first signs of my maturity.
When I was younger, I used to impose my ideas harshly. Now, I like to keep calm and speak rationally while maintaining a steady ground. I don’t feel the need to prove my point to no one. I don’t like to yell, hold grudges or be conflictual anymore.
These negative emotions don’t serve me anything good. It only messes up my inner peace.
12. Do what you love.
“…and you’ll never work another day in your life.”
This was a lesson from this past year. All my life I thought this was the biggest cliche I have ever heard. But, it’s truly not.
My goal was to get a job doing something I’m good at and earn enough to feel comfortable. When I did that I felt so miserable.
13. Trust people.
I used to be such a pessimist. I never trusted anyone until they spent a lot of time showing me that I could open up.
Trust me — instead of wasting your time and energy waiting for people to do you wrong, redirect that energy to overcome hardships IF it happens.
But, don’t be a fool.
14. Recognise your mistakes.
You’re not weak if you apologise. Only a powerful person can admit when they’re wrong.
15. Be grateful for the people from your past.
Regardless of the reason that person no longer is present in your life, think about how your life would have turned out if you never met them.
16. Enjoy doing nothing.
You don’t have to always hustle. Sometimes we all need to recharge.
17. Don’t limit your goals.
You can absolutely design your “dream life”. If you know what you want, focus your resources on taking each step to get you closer to your final destination.
18. Be happy for others.
I always genuinely feel proud and happy when my friends achieve something they wished for.
19. Don’t hold grudges.
It will only consume your energy.
20. Check on your loved ones.
21. Be organised.
With your money, time, and energy.
22. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself…
It’s normal to not have everything figured out — you can’t plan all your stops from your life’s trajectory.
23. And stop comparing yourself to others.
What you have today is something others pray for.
24. Vocalise your needs.
Giving others the power of making you happy will only make you weak. No one knows how to make you happy better than yourself.
25. Fall in love with your life.
What are the lessons you learned and hold the most value for your belief system? I would love it if you’d share them with me.
