4 Simple Strategies That Help Me to Avoid the Habit Trap
No routine is indispensable, and one should learn to let go before it becomes an addiction
The Oxford Dictionary defines habit as a settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up.
According to the Cambridge Dictionary, a habit is something that you do often and regularly, sometimes without knowing that you are doing it.
While description of the word can be tweaked as per convenience, habit is a peculiarly human trait that develops over a period. It is neither systematic nor planned. It just happens. Some habits become part and parcel of day-to-day life, others come and go in cycles.
It does not matter if habits are good or bad; the fact is they do have a tendency to limit and hold you back. Over a period, individuals become subservient to their habits without actually realizing it. In this sense, suffice to say habits outweigh commonsense and understanding.
That being said, no human being consciously creates habits. On the contrary, habits develop in the subconscious. One can make a conscious effort to do away with it, though. Which is precisely what I try to do.
My family members have absolutely no doubt that this is my best quality. To my colleagues and friends, it is something difficult to comprehend. If there is one thing I like about myself…
… It is the habit of not clinging to a habit. Over the years, I have to a great extent mastered it.
Before you jump to any conclusions, let me explain that like any other individual I have, at a given point in time, a cluster of habits, a few of them good but mostly bad. There have been occasions when I keep doing something for a somewhat longer period, but it never comes to a point where it gets difficult to give it up completely.
The reasons are manifold. Maybe it has got to do with the fact that I get bored doing the same stuff over and over again may be one of the reasons. That I have diverse interests, and each interest demands separate attention, is maybe another.
Irrespective of the possible reasons, and the attempts to understand and explain them, what matters is the fact that my habits keep changing from time to time rather I have made it a habit of not continuing with any particular habit, if I can put it that way.
Over the years, I have come to believe that there’s no habit that is indispensable. In fact, from my personal experiences, I have deduced that there are four simple strategies that can help any individual avoid falling into that ‘habit trap,’ rather giving up on any particular habit altogether. They are have been useful to me in the overall scheme of things., and rest assured there is no harm in case you are interested to try them.
1. Embrace the change, negate the blame
You are quick to blame others for habits that you acquire. It is the most convenient means to shirk responsibility. Am I right, or am I right?
It is very easy to put the blame on others. Fact is, the fault lies within. No one can force you to pick up a habit unless you willingly allow yourself to be drawn into its vortex. A habit is a manifestation of your choice.
When you get into a habit, you seldom think about the repercussions. It is only after some damage is done that you realize it was possible to take preventive measures beforehand. The biggest of such measures is to embrace change.
Change is the only constant, and every individual needs to accept this. Some of these changes are gradual, and happen over a period. Others are those that are consciously incorporated. That being said, changes disrupt status quo, which is precisely what a habit is.
Replacing an old habit with a new one works in the short term. But the more you change your lifestyle and diversify your interests, the more chances of you getting rid of a habit in the long term. An individual with varied interests unwittingly negates the possibility of interests manifesting into long-term habits.
2. Observe and absorb
Observation is a great attribute to possess. In fact, it is a must have. What you seldom learn from your own habits, you do so by observing others over a period. This can serve as a crash course. It is firsthand practical knowledge, something no textbook can teach.
By observing the habits of others, you improve your overall understanding as regards what to do and what not to. Look at how they suffer from their bad habits and how they benefit from their good qualities. It will help you make a clear distinction. You incorporate changes to your lifestyle based on these observations.
Observing those whose habits are similar to yours is the best learning experiences. Such people are inadvertently the best teachers. However, mere observation won’t help matters.
Making note of the impact habits have on their respective lives helps you draw a conclusion. Based on that conclusive and first hand experience, you decide which habit is benefitting you, and those that you can do away with.
There are so many people who have inspired me to do away with what could have been bad habits in the long run. I have expressed my sincerest gratitude to a few of them. Others, I am grateful to, even if I have never got a chance to tell them in person.
In fact, I have come to believe every person that you observe and learn from deserves your gratitude.
3. Switch the setting
Again, this is something that has helped me tremendously. Some habits tend to be place-specific. Leave the place and get rid of that habit… It is as simple as that.
It can be a particular house, the neighborhood, a city, or even a country. While the decision to make such significant changes is any but easy, switching such settings can indeed help considerably to get rid of certain habits. This is perhaps the only example where running away from the problem actually helps in finding a solution to it.
To cite an example, when I was in the United Kingdom on work for an extended period, I had got into this habit of consuming fish and chips on a regular basis. I was aware, and was also made aware of on a regular basis, the consequences of consuming such deep fried products.
Yet getting rid of the habit proved difficult till… you guessed it. I don’t recall consuming this lethal combo frequently since the day I left the shores. To be honest, I do not remember the last time I ate something that was deep fried.
Change of setting has been consistently helpful to me. Over the course of my life I have never lived at a particular place beyond a certain time frame. As a child, I benefitted from the fact that work made my father change cities at frequent intervals.
As an adult, professional requirements have ensured I keep changing bases. It is anything but conscious. When it does happen, it is anything but a surprise. Nonetheless, it has been a pattern, and something that I see as a blessing in disguise.
4. Maintain social distancing
This is social distancing as well… albeit of a different kind. Your friends and peer group play a significant role not only in the formation of habits but also in sustaining them. It encourages you to do things you would otherwise wish to avoid.
Even if you are working towards giving up a habit, or are on the verge of doing away with something, it is your friends who will urge you to indulge for one last time. You are emotionally blackmailed in every which way, till you finally succumb to their demands.
Their triumph lies in convincing you to side with them, rather forcing your submission to their whims. That all of your efforts up to that point have gone down the drain is the least of their concerns. Worse still, you cannot blame them, for they will accept none.
Like every individual, I have faced such ‘friendly encouragements’ on many occasions, in fact continue to face them every now and then. My strategy has been a pragmatic one. I have multiple sets of friends, each relatively less friendly, if not completely unaware, of the other.
These groups may bump into each other once in a blue moon, and I may find a passing mention in their discussion once in a while, but that is just about it. I make it a point to meet one group at a time, thereby not getting used to any of the common habits of any friends' circle per se. It is a simple divide and derive (benefits) formula.
I am not sure if it is practically possible for everyone to employ such a strategy to good effect. However, I am certain that it works. At least, it has worked well for me. Besides, you will never know until you give it a shot.
To conclude…
While you seldom realize fallen you have fallen into a ‘habit trap’ there is no habit that cannot be done away with. Besides, one needs to always remember habits tend to hold you back. At some point, one has to let them go in order to move ahead, with sanity and vanity intact.
In the final analysis, while it is not possible to remain habit-free, it is important to understand that it is habits that eventually turn into rather form the foundation for addiction.
As such, to live life on self-laid terms, the best habit one can acquire is to not hold on to a habit in the long run.
