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5 Cognitive Biases That Are Stopping You From Moving On

The real psychology behind what’s holding you back

Manj Bahra
Published in
11 min readMar 31, 2024

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You’re struggling to move on. My thoughts are with you. Suffering through Cupid’s arrows is an unavoidable rite of passage for all humans. It can be especially difficult when you know you need to move on, but somehow you just can’t.

While it’s easy to blame yourself, the truth is not all moving on is equal. Some heartbreaks are more complex, particularly when mixed signals, unresolved endings, or the belief in destined relationships cloud our perception.

When present, these ingredients can lead to excessive overthinking, crippling anxiety, and an unshakeable feeling of stuckness. Of course, this only makes moving on harder, often to the point of wondering whether you’ll ever feel normal again.

Perhaps you can relate. I certainly can. My own experience of heartbreak left me shattered beyond belief. And it wasn’t just the rejection. It was dealing with the mixed signals, lack of closure, and the feeling that this relationship was meant to be. Ultimately, I couldn’t accept what was happening despite the other person telling me they didn’t feel the same way.

Within days, I went from being completely rational to unrecognisable. Obsessive thoughts, horoscopes, inability…

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Manj Bahra
ILLUMINATION

Dating Coach | Helping women understand men and find their life partner | Join my FREE community for more: www.skool.com/modern-dating-wisdom-7204