ILLUMINATION | HOW-TO.
5 Toxic Traits of Friends And How to Fix It.
The Word Friendship is so pleasant….
But the word toxic in itself is so much unpleasant and people don’t want it in every aspect of their life.
Either love, friendship, parents, or any other relationship, everybody wants to avoid toxicity in it. The state of being toxic should not be accepted in any relationship even if that person is very special in your life.
In my school life, there was so much toxicity in friendships but at that time I couldn't understand it.
As I grew I become aware of what a friendship should be like and started to remove that toxicity from my life.
There are three types of people regarding this:
- Those people who experience this toxicity in a manner that they don’t even realize that it's toxic. And when someone wants to inform them they don’t listen until it's very late.
2. Those people who realize the toxic essence of their friendship but they turn their blind eye to it thinking it will be fixed on itself.
3. Those who realize it and try to fix it before it's too late.
Which one of these are you? think about it.
Here I’m going to tell you traits of toxicity that exist in most friendships:
. If you are 1. you will realize the toxicity that you're experiencing.
. If you are 2. you will get to know why it doesn’t get fixed on its own.
. If you are 3. you will know the ways to fix it.
According to my personal experience.
5 traits of toxicity in a relation:
Either it's you or the other person.
1. Laughing at everyone:
Mark my words if there talking, gossiping, and laughing about others, here I mean laughing at the very small traits of others like clothes, looks, and other stuff which they are proud to have then they are sure laughing at you too.
It is a huge flag that many people think ignore easily. But it shouldn’t be ignored.
What you can do here is when they talk bad about others you should stop them politely but with solid reason. Tell them you don’t like it if they agree they will improve if not you should just stay away from them.
Now here if they care about you and your friendship they will approach you and will understand why your restricting them from this habit.
2. Encouraging your bad habits:
One time I fought with my parents and I came and told my friends about it. At that time I was so guilty cause I respect my parents and I thought my friends would make me realize my mistake BUT I was shocked when they told me that I did the right cause according to them you should not respect anyone.
I didn’t think much about it but as time passed I started to notice other things like how they don’t stop me from any bad habits instead they encouraged me.
What you can do here is test them if they care about you or not. if they don’t then there is nothing that you can do because you can’t make anyone care for you.
3. Bringing out your insecurities:
One of my friends used to bring out my insecurities on every occasion and make fun of it. When I told her to stop, she said that I was just being sensitive over a small thing and should try to adjust for them.
That was the point I realize that she was toxic.
What you should do, is just unfriend that person like I did cause if a person can use your insecurity against you and won’t feel sorry for it, they will not be your true friend.
4. Won’t keep your secrets:
Why a person would tell their friends about their secrets, WHY?
Cause there is trust between them.
And if that friend can’t keep your secret safe and tell it to everyone then the trust is broken and maybe you too cause sometimes we share our deepest secret with them that we don’t share with anyone.
People ignore this factor because they think that their friend has just told their small secret to others and won’t tell the big one. Well, they're wrong. Small or big, a secret is a secret that is not meant to be told to everyone.
What you can do is warn them strictly. Ask them to understand you and stop with their behavior.
5. They would interfere in everything:
Either love, relationships, likes, dislikes, preferences, or any other thing they would just interface in it and would enforce their opinion on you and try to change you, shape you according to themselves cause they think they have the right to control your life.
what you should do, is to make them understand they cannot control your life, and if they don’t understand end your friendship right there.
Except for these one more things that I felt was the ‘if I am in trouble I will call you but if you need me you can’t call me’ thing. That was their logic which is totally wrong.
I hope it helps you to eliminate these toxic traits and friends from your life.
Thank you for reading.
