9 perspectives on fear that help me to overcome my fears
General aspects of fear
Disclaimer: I am NOT a psychiatrist! All things that I describe come from my personal experience and from applying information provided by books and other people. Here I deal with psychological fear (= anxiety) from things that are NOT inherently dangerous but may cause uncomfortable physiological responses. For example, agoraphobia is an anxiety where people perceive an environment as unsafe and from which they cannot easily escape (like public transit or shopping center). However, as we continue, I will deal also with stuff that can be dangerous to the unexperienced/untrained person. But the basic principles of overcoming a fear apply there, too.
My basic assumptions are:
1. Fear of XY decreases the quality of my life and/or hinders me in doing a certain action, and therefore I want to get rid of my fear of XY.
2. Most fears have been somehow programmed into me either unknowingly by other fearful or limited people, or on purpose by people that want others to be fearful. So those fears are no natural laws and I am not obliged to stick with them at all.
3. A fear from XY comes from feeling powerless regarding XY. Thus, everything that empowers me is useful:
Gaining knowledge about XY increases my understanding of XY so that I can act with confidence and efficacy.
Getting physically stronger helps me where physical strength is key.
Boosting my health/immune system helps me not even getting sick and not being afraid even if everyone is bragging about how bad disease XY is.
Etc.
4. Fear is a mighty weapon and there are corporations and governments that apply certain psychological tricks to program fears into us so they can increase their profits or power. My duty towards myself to know those tricks and to be resilient to those tricks.
Example: Every autumn here Germany I see advertisements in the windows of pharmacies saying something like this: “Autumn time = sniffles time” advertising certain drugs against sniffles. This is a subtle programming, because even if you do not have sniffles at that time, you can read it everywhere and it enters your subconscious mind. You think it does not work? Then why do they place those advertisements?
5. Fear is a powerful tool and I can use it to my advantage. If I want to achieve Y and in order to do so I need to do Z but am afraid of it. I ask myself: what if I do NOT achieve Y or even get into a condition K that is opposite to Y? If K is much worse than Y then I can use the fear from K as a driving power to overcome my fear from Z and then achieve Y. Example: I want to get a wonderful girlfriend but I am afraid of speaking to women. So, the opposite scenario is that I never get a girlfriend and I use the fear from staying a loner for ever and try everything in order to overcome my fear of speaking to women. The question is: which fear is more powerful?
6. Shifting perspective and perception helps. In this very moment while I am paralyzed by my fear from V there are some people doing exactly the thing V from which I am holding back just because I am afraid of.
7. Placebo and nocebo effect. The former is the belief that something has a positive effect on me. But the latter is less known. It is the opposite belief, i.e., that something has a negative effect on me. Although in both cases there is nothing in it that can actually cause a positive or negative effect, respectively. Bothe effects are best known in medical research. I will cover these effects in a separate article.
8. Nothing lasts forever. Everything has an end. So, if you are stressed or scared just wait and it will pass by.
9. THE most important thing in order to overcome fears is self-love and self-respect. I deserve a good life because I am. Period. And so you do. PERIOD. No discussion about it! Especially when it comes to points 1, 2, and 4 from above. Yes, they will call me egoistic or even narcissistic. This is another psychological trick to break my will so they can get theirs. They are using my fear of not belonging, but in my case: I do not care! At all!
Dear reader: if you prefer to dwell on your fear, you can stop reading my articles at this point. We live in a society where fear is omnipresent. Religions of all kinds and all over the world are programming the fear from demons and devils into the minds of people so they comply with what religious institutions impose on them. It has been working for millennia. Corporations, literature, blockbusters and politicians do similar only the “demons” are different and often more subtle, seeming even to be scientifically proven. And people love to talk about their fears and thus are constantly reinforcing them within their social circles and hence in the human society as a whole.
For the others: see you in my following articles that will deal with specific and concrete scenarios from my life. Because my purpose or even mission is to contribute to get rid of unnecessary fears and live a free life.
Cheers.
Wito
P.S. FEAR = Feeling Excited And Ready
Suggested reading (Amazon affiliate links from which I get a small percentage, for you it does not cost more):
English:
Webb & Mann. 2018. Mastering Fear: A Navy SEAL’s Guide.
Audible https://amzn.to/4aMbT4r
Kindle https://amzn.to/4aSyV9Z
Deutsch:
Webb & Mann. 2019. Angst überwinden wir ein Navy Seal.
Buch gebunden: https://amzn.to/3vM30Jm
Kindle https://amzn.to/4aw4OoR
