A Place Called Happily Ever After
Everything in life comes with an expiration date. Even feelings.
Nothing lasts forever. You cannot stay forever happy or sad all the time. Emotions and feelings, like a person’s behavior changes over time. Even the phrase “happily ever after” is incorrect because there is no such place in real. It’s the circle of life. But to stay at peace, you need to let go of past experiences, however good or bad, by imbibing a little of that in shaping you. In my short existence of 30+ years, here’s what I have learnt from the good and bad life experiences:
For a very long time I felt lonely because my parents left me (even before I was ten), to the mercy of relatives who were kind at times due to my youngest sibling’s health treatment. So yes, I have abandonment issues. Often friends call me cold and cynical and aloof. But that’s who I am and I like me. I am centered and clear about the things I want and don’t want in life and so I have finally stopped raising the issue with my parents.
During the lonely childhood, I faced constant insults and barbs from my uncles regarding my father’s wealth or my inability to focus on studies and even poor performance in the field. It has made me conscious of the fact that money is important but there is no need to flaunt it. Also, now when I am raising my child, I know now what not to say to him and also, what will keep him motivated. So those sarcastic comments that stayed with me for the last 20+ years have finally lost the poisonous effect they once had.
I used to hide and cry when I missed my mother. Especially when I would see other children getting cuddles by their parents. As a grown-up, it helped me decide on the choice of career. I opted for slow pace of career growth and my salary has virtually stayed the same for the last 7–8 years. I know, all this sounds disturbing, right? But thanks to the experience I had as a child, I am okay with all this cause I get to spend so much time with the little one. I am there whenever he needs me.
Life doesn’t have to be sad/happy. It’s a mix of both. You need to go for the seasoning that suits you best though.
