Ageing Gracefully
“Don’t try to be young. Just open your mind. Stay interested in stuff. There are so many things I won’t live long enough to find out about, but I’m still curious about them.” Betty White
I want to be remembered now in my twilight years for having aged gracefully. Gone is the yearning for money, power, accomplishments, degrees, and being at the right place at the right time.
Now I only compete with myself. I set targets and work out a schedule each morning and if I am unable to achieve my targets I am upset as it implies I am slowing down.
Having worked all my life fulfilling deadlines, moving from one thing to another, and dealing with various issues concerning the welfare of people I enjoy the freedom of being my own boss.
Yet, out of habit, I give myself no slack. I have prioritised health as an area to concentrate on and now try to be less dependent on domestic staff.
Working for 35 years without a break did not leave me with an inclination to put time and effort into household chores.
I suddenly find myself enjoying looking after the abundance of plants in my balconies. I now realise plants are like babies, the more you care for them and nurture them the better the results. I now do not hesitate to put my fingers into soil and read extensively about how and when to plant seasonal flowers. The joy of seeing your seedlings sprout, grow and flower reminds you that there is a time for everything!
Alas ! Flowers will wither eventually, having lived their time. Beauty fades but the memory of those vibrant colours stay with you forever. The next season you replant and feel the same intense joy and happiness when the flowers bloom.
“A flower’s appeal is in its contradictions – so delicate in form yet strong in fragrance, so small in size yet big in beauty, so short in life yet long on effect.” – Terri Guillemets
Similarly humans live their limited time on earth . I would like to be remembered for my spirit, my desire to teach and learn, and contribute happiness and joy amongst family and friends.
My husband being an avid golfer, I somehow couldn’t understand his passion and love for the game. I hated it more for the fact as most weekends I ended up a golf widow.
Covid and retirement resulted in us spending more time together and wanting to share our hobbies. I decided to delight him by showing an interest in golf. I never realised how happy my decision would make him.
Today, he accompanies me to my golf lessons and the look of pride when I hit a ball satisfactorily, is similar to the joy our child gave us when she took her first few tentative steps independently.
There is never an age to learn. One has to be inclined and willing and with a little shift of gears, it’s easy to begin from the beginning. All that you need is positivity and enthusiasm and somebody by your side to motivate you and even the toughest of tasks are achievable.
Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result.’ – Tommy Armour
Today, I see myself enjoying the game I thought was a waste of time. I return from the driving range and course energised, wanting for nothing more than the beautiful views and abundance of nature that engulfs my whole being. I see myself slowly getting addicted to golf much to the joy of my spouse.
I see myself pursuing everything I previously shied away from. I am used to schedules and timetables and now it’s more about exercise and staying off the couch.
“Being your best is not so much about overcoming the barriers other people place in front of you as it is about overcoming the barriers we place in front of ourselves.” Kieran Perkins
I overcame the fear of water and swimming that I harboured all my life. I hated walking in the hot summers, so began taking my walks and exercising in the indoor pool. A year later I can proudly acknowledge that I have become fitter due to my regular swimming and workout in the pool. It’s like an addiction and even if it’s raining I do not miss my hour in the pool.
The importance of exercise becomes more apparent as you age. Having spent years as a lazy couch potato I had to conquer my reluctance to exercise.
“The inspiration you seek is already inside you, be silent and listen “– Rumi
However, if the inspiration is from within there is no stopping. I enjoy my yoga sessions with my young teacher, who not only encourages me to stretch and do more demanding yoga poses but also gives me the love and affection that I miss not having my daughter in the same continent. Yoga has helped in making me more flexible, calmer and meditative. I have lost the urgency of doing things there and then. It has made me more rational and a happier person, which reflects in my persona.
“A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.” John Barrymore
I still dream of long healthy useful years ahead. I want these years to be filled with laughter, happiness, travel and learning innumerable new things. I now enjoy this freedom from having to be professional and achieving the best results.
I still like to dress well, look younger than my age which is no easy task. Happiness however has a way of reflecting on your face and I can say that I am in a happy space. I look forward to meeting my friends who give me the love and affection and the confidence not to fear loneliness.
“The purpose of our lives is to be happy.” – Dalai Lama