An Introvert’s Guide to Make It Through Unwanted Social Interactions
My favourite tip — avoid going at all cost
“I love social engagements”, said no introvert ever.
I know this because I, too, am an introvert, and I’ll do anything to avoid going to places where I’ll have to interact with people and make small talk.
Introverts are often labelled shy and anti-social though this is not always true. They simply prefer quieter, lower-stimulation environments, and enjoy spending time with a few close people rather than in large groups.
An introvert’s social energy drains quickly in group gatherings and it makes them crave solitude and calm, to recharge.
As Susan Cain says in her book, “Quiet: The Power Of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking”,
“Introverts … may have strong social skills and enjoy parties and business meetings, but after a while wish they were home in their pajamas.”
No matter how hard you try to escape social meetings, there are times when you have no option but to go out there.
What then?
Then you need to have a plan — you should be prepared for what could come your way and how you’re going to get through.
Here are some tried and tested tips to help make that time bearable and ease that anxiety.
- Make a mental note of how long you can survive there without feeling emotionally burnt out. Stick to the plan and leave — ask a sibling or a friend to make that *important* and *urgent* phone call.
- Have a list of plausible excuses ready if you can excuse yourself and leave — work, appointment, children or babysitter issues, other plans, anything that is convincing.
- If leaving early doesn’t seem possible, find yourself a corner farthest from the hustle and bustle of the gathering. This will help you stay away from the action and ensure you aren’t easily approachable.
- The most common distraction at your disposal will be your mobile phone. Use it to pretend you’re the busiest person on the planet, better known as LBDN — looking busy doing nothing.
- Keep your head down and try not to make eye contact with people. Dark sunglasses always come in handy.
- Carrying a book with you is always a good idea — you’ll never regret keeping a book close by. Even if you’re not much into reading, keep a book with you, nevertheless.
- When all your efforts have gone in vain and a conversation seems imminent, don’t panic. Talk less and listen more. Nod and smile. It’ll help you judge if there’s anyone with the same wavelength as yours, and it might lead to a meaningful conversation — one that you genuinely enjoy.
- If you don’t want to talk much, focus on the food — keep your head down and just eat. Stuff your mouth with food and point out you’re unable to talk if you sense you’re expected to join the ongoing conversation.
- You can always fake a phone call — excuse yourself because you have a call to make and go to a quieter area. Just make sure you turn the mobile phone on to silent mode.
- My favourite tip — avoid going at all costs!
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