Andie Gets A Gun
But never gets to use it
Andrew, as his parents called him, liked pulling the legs off spiders. He liked throwing stones at squirrels and he especially enjoyed torturing Chester.
One day Andieâs parents gave him a gun. A shiny, brand new, Daisy Red Ryder pellet gun.
He promised solemnly only to shoot at tin cans. All the while smiling slyly at Chester.
Poor Chester had developed a limp recently. He has been blinded in one eye and his fur had somehow gotten badly singed.
But do not fret gentle reader. There is happy ending to our tale..
Before he had a chance to use the gun. Andie got a toothache.
His parents took him to The Dentist.
The Dentist has a strange machine. It is a very large glass cylinder with sharp blades. It resembles an oversized kitchen blender.
Andie did not like The Dentist.
He bit The Dentist on the hand.
The Dentist told Andieâs parents that Andie was afraid of the drill and that he had leapt out of the chair and ran away.
Andie never got to play with his gun. He was never seen again.
Chester lived peacefully to a ripe old age
And The Dentistâs brother-in-law who owns a Polish restaurant continues to serve a nice meaty borscht.
Jim McAulayđ says âThe definition of inflation is: paying todayâs prices with last yearâs salary.â
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