Build your dreams, don’t chase them
3 subconsciously mistakes everyone makes
“Among all the people that come to me , 99% of them fails. The ones who really succeed, are the people who has an idea, but no one wants to listen to them. And the only way to get their idea into the world, is to open a business. They don’t want money, they just want their idea out there.” — Steve Jobs
As long as you have a dream, you’ll make mistakes… lots of them. Either you like it or not, failing is part of the process. But did you know that most of the mistakes come from the way you perceive the reality around you?
Building your dreams, means building your subjective reality.
The thing is, most of us don’t build it… we are just chasing it. And how can you chase something so subjective?
It’s like trying to chase your own car, while you are already in it. How can you do that?
Well… there is only one answer. You can’t. The only thing you can chase, is someone else’s car, thinking is yours.
The same with your dreams too. You chase them because those are not your dreams, but someone else’s.
In this article we’ll explore 3 mistakes almost everyone makes when trying to accomplish their dreams. Because your time is precious and you have a lot of work to do, lets dive in:
1. You don’t realize what you already have and want more
Yep. This is true. One of the biggest mistakes people do when starting up a business is that they don’t realize what they have in their own hands. And I am not talking about that cliche called gratitude.
You wake up every morning to write on your book? Every night you go to bed so late because you worked on your business or your idea? Every day you have to alternate between your personal life, professional life, and working on your dream? Let me tell you what’s this: THE DREAM.
The dream is not some sort of reward, the dream is the process itself.
Example:
You start a business. Your goal is to reach 1.000 clients. But first, you need to reach that first client that start everything, right? How can you do that when you never worked with clients before.
You will fail a loooot! That’s a fact. You will do so many things in the wrong way. But let’s say that after many trial and errors you did it. You have that first client. Congrats!
Now what? Well… you still have to reach 1.000 clients.
From costumer to costumer you must learn new things, and for every new one, you hit tens of walls. Now you feel stuck. A year pass on. Maybe two years. And you barely made 500 clients.
Along this hard process yiu feel down, and your probably feel that you should do something else. But in this very moment, you are not aware of one little thing that could change everything.
You already live your dream. You are writing your own story right in this very moment. But in your obsession of reaching your goal (1000 costumers), you can’t see the whole picture, because you are already in it.
This whole process is the dream. You do what you love after all, right?
And this moves us to —
2. You don’t love to do something, you love just the idea of doing it
This is probably the most common mistake I have seen at young people.
Everyone wants money, everyone wants to become CEO, everyone wants to have a big business with at least 10.000 employees.
“Some people dream of success, while others wake up and work hard at it” — Napoleon Hill
In my career as a writer and as a filmmaker, I worked mostly with young enthusiastic people. And I noticed this weird thing. They would told me they want to go to Hollywood, to make blockbusters, to become big movie producers, or to make a lot of money.
But actually they just loved the idea of being at Hollywood, of having a nice house, and taking photos with people on the street. That’s why many of them quit even before starting.
That’s a difference between loving to do something, and loving the idea of doing something. You love to make business, or you just love the idea of having a private jet? You love singing, or you just love the idea of being on a stage, with thousand of people yelling your name?
Have you ever wondered why just 1% of people become billionaires?
Because they love what they do more than the reward. They love the hustle part. They love the moments in which their decisional skills are challenged.
That’s why many of them don’t even focus on making profits, but their main focus is on doing something nice.
So if you really have a dream, you have to fall in love with the process, because otherwise not only you will never get your dream come true, but you will live in frustrations all of your life.
3. It’s not your dream actually
This is a hard one.
One of the main reasons why people quit at what they are doing, is because they don’t have the drive. And the main reason they don’t have the drive, is because subconsciously, they try to realize someone else’s dream or vision.
Either you do it because of your inner frustrations and you want to prove something, or you want to make someone proud, or you want to win against someone… all these “dreams” are not yours.
And you are the only one who can realize that.
Everyone has been introducing their own ideas and visions inside your head, since you were just a child.
Over time, all those ideas entered your subconscious mind, driving your day by day decisions in shaping your life.
“The subconscious mind is a warehouse of all your experiences, emotions, and beliefs.” — Joe Dispenza
Some time ago I was in this situation as well, and I was obsessed of getting an Oscar in my lifetime, but after a little more studying, I realised that I was obsessed to prove others my skills. I wanted the world to see me. I wanted to shine.
And after I became aware that I was full of frustrations, I started to write more quality stories with emotional impact.
“The subconscious mind is a programmable hard drive that stores all of our experiences and beliefs.” — Joe Dispenza
This means that you can program your subconscious mind, so you can become more aware of your real thoughts and feelings.
I strongly recommend you to read Joe Dispenza, Tony Robbins, Jim Kwik, or other authors who have written about neuroscience. In this way you can learn more about your mind and what drives you.
CONCLUSIONS & TAKE AWAYS
Your dream is like a rollercoaster. You don’t go into a roller coaster thinking of the finish line, you go into a roller coaster because you want to feel all the ups and downs.
And don’t forget to become aware of your mind and the real reasons why you take decisions. You have nothing to prove to anyone, but yourself.
The world sees you as you see yourself.
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