Catnip (No Milkshakes, Sorry)

Because I don’t want any human intruders in my yard

Photo by Man Dy at Pexels.com

With thanks to this song by Kelis (raunchiness warning!). Lyrics only here.

My catnip will bring a lost cat to my yard
My neighbor’s boy, who left her in sobs
That’s right, my stoic neighbor
If it works I’ll share my formula.

My catnip will bring the escapee to my yard
And he’s like, I’m semi-feral
That’s right — oh, sardines in oil?
Don’t distract me from that opened door.

I know you need it
My feline secret
What the cats go insane for
They start to writhe
My weed’s sublime
It’s catnip time.

Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow
Crush it up
The lost boy’s waiting
Meow meow meow meow meow
Let it drop
I’m shameless, baiting.

My catnip brings Siamese to my yard
Tabbies, calicos and Bengals
Even strays from Portugal
It’s got six stars on Tripadvisor.