Do You Get Scared of Fulfilling Your Dreams?
Do you ever get scared of fulfilling your dreams? I don’t mean scared that you might not be able to fulfill them but scared that you would.
Will my dreams be as grand as I imagined them to be?
What if they fall short of my expectations?
Will they be worth all this work?
And the most daunting of all…
Then what?
What happens when I fulfill them? These were dreams that kept me working when all I wanted to do was quit. These were the same dreams that were the reason I kept waking up every day.
When I finally fulfill them, then what?
My childhood was comfortable, but it was far from grand. We lived one day at a time and didn’t have the means to do much more than that. The only thing that I could freely do was dream, and that I did.
I dreamt a lot of dreams — to travel to all countries in the world, to see all the beautiful places I only read about in books, to eat whatever I want whenever I want, to attend concerts, festivals, and events without worrying how to get there, to buy whatever I want for myself and my family, and to help people dream as I did.
Building these castles in the air was the easiest part. After all, as a kid, everything was just in my head and the idea of fulfilling them seemed too far in the future. My dreams kept me striving to be better and achieve greater. I cultivated values such as discipline, perseverance, and resilience all because I wanted to fulfill them.
It was only when I became an adult that the weight of these dreams started crushing me. Surely, I couldn’t disappoint the 7-year-old me who dreamt of riding a plane or the 15-year-old me who wanted to see Hogwarts? No matter how difficult life got, I pushed through with the thought that my younger self depended on me.
That’s how I started slowly fulfilling my childhood dreams. At 21, I stepped on the first-ever foreign soil I had set foot on. I imagined it to be life-changing, with tears in my eyes knowing I waited two decades to experience it. Underwhelmingly, no tears were shed. However, I felt how pivotal that moment was in my life. I was able to prove to both my younger and my adult self that I could do it, that I could fulfill my dreams.
At 28, I got my first car, and it was the first time I felt extremely proud of myself. All those years of not going to events because of transportation issues, of relying on others for a ride, and of not having the freedom to go anywhere I wanted to were all things of the past. Now, I could bring my family anywhere without relying on others.
The same year, I planned the birthday trip I always wanted. I made sure everything was prepared to make it perfect, as it was my literal biggest childhood dream. However, I couldn’t help but worry. What if my biggest dream wasn’t how I thought it would be, just like when I first went out of the country?
I was going to spend my birthday with my family at Hogwarts. What if Hogwarts wasn’t as magical as I read in the books? Guess what? IT WAS. The first second I saw it and I was at a loss for words. I was teary-eyed while I walked along the edge of the Black Lake. My worries were for nothing —although it wasn’t perfect, my dream was as grand as I thought it to be. Everything I worked hard for suddenly felt like it led up to that moment. I knew my inner child was bawling her eyes out as I was restraining myself to drop tears.
The most recent dream I fulfilled was to attend the concert of my favorite artist. Boy, was it definitely a dream come true! I was taken back to 10 years ago when she first visited our country and all I could do was eat as much Cornetto as I could for more chances to win a concert ticket. This time, I saw her, sang (or screamed?) with her, and cheered with tens of thousands of people in a new but amazing city.
My biggest childhood dreams came true in just a span of a few years, so I can’t help but think, what now?
Now that I checked these off my bucket list, then what?
I’ll go dream again, that’s what.
The dreams I’ve gathered when I was young are slowly coming true, so the only logical next step is to dream some more. There are always more places to see, cultures to experience, food to try, people to meet, and things to do.
There is always more to dream of.
So, do I get scared of fulfilling my dreams? Absolutely.
However, when I start to get scared, I return to the child who dreamt. I’m sure that child wouldn’t mind if her dream wasn’t as perfect as she first thought — what mattered was that she got to live her dream. She would be proud.
When I get scared, I return to the child who dreamt. Like her, I dream again.
