Fill up Your Glass
Taking Care of Yourself, for Yourself, and Those Around You
There are many resources available to us as that tell us how to maximize our daily efficiency and effectiveness. However, the excuses of lack of time and busy schedule can often get in our way when pursuing our best, happiest, and productive selves. The hustle and bustle of life as Americans can be crippling at times. Living in a society and culture that values time spent working above all else has influenced generations of people to think that if they’re not doing something productive all the time, they’re not worth much.
This message usually isn’t written boldly for us to digest, but there are many insinuations throughout mass and social media that only the busy and productive are worth a damn. While I don’t usually agree with blanket statements that deal in absolutes, there is a hint of truth within that message. The methods in which some of us are avoiding productive and fulfilling lives is troubling. Our society is experiencing an age of rapid technological advancement that is leading us to crave quick dopamine rushes throughout the entirety of each day. Furthermore, these newly developed desires of needing a quick form of entertainment and gratification are displacing our long term search for happiness and fulfillment.
The lives of some of the greatest thinkers, leaders, entrepreneurs and CEOs were about solving problems and serving the masses, never about their personal need for entertainment or fueling their ego. Younger generations are prone to equating popularity on a social app and the engagement that comes with it to a fulfilled, purposeful and meaningful life that will lead to happiness. When they don’t receive the same attention as someone else they aspire to be like, they experience increased anxiety and depression. This should be of major concern for the generations of the future.
Unless you have monetized your social media platforms they are merely a distraction that is actively deteriorating your quality of life, moral, productivity, happiness, and sense of fulfillment. Constant and excess blue light exposure from any type of digital screen has been proven to have ill effects on the human brain. Practice moderation.
Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with seeking occasional entertainment through Twitter, Instagram, Tik Tok, and Snapchat. In fact, they can be used for good such as promoting social justice, sharing important information, self help, maintaining relationships, and getting a good laugh. But, are you proud of your screen time? The average American spends 2 hours a day on social media. Imagine what else you could do with that~600 hours a year. Are you sure you can’t spend your time more productively in order to reach a happier state of mind? Social media and digital distraction, like everything else, are subject to the law of diminishing returns. Peace, tranquility, and fulfillment have yet to be achieved by someone spending all their free time on their phone, worrying about everything and everyone else.
Exposure to blue light has been scientifically proven to weaken the connection between your amygdala and your prefrontal cortex. For those of us not well versed in psychology, your amygdala is the part of your brain known for (some of) the processing of fear and emotions instinctually. The prefrontal cortex is largely responsible for the executive functions of the brain such as decision making and conscious thought. (These definitions are simplifications used to illustrate my further points in this post. If the relationship between these two parts of your brain interests you I would recommend reading Brain Wash by David and Austin Perlmutter, and The 5 A.M Club by Robin Sharma)
Smart phones, applications, streaming services, and online shopping websites are designed to gain your attention and keep it. They also use techniques to promote an urgency for users to keep checking and refreshing them immediately after you close it. Whether it’s push notifications, the red badge showing how many notifications you have unopened, or the automatic scrolling features on Tik Tok, Instagram and Facebook, these platforms are all designed to leave you subconsciously hungry for more and more fast paced entertainment. The sudden rush of emotions we feel when we see funny videos, clickbait headlines, or nicely edited visuals all lead us on to the next post, waiting for the next wave of emotion that makes feel good… even if it’s only for a couple seconds. This is made possible by the rush of dopamine we feel when seeing content we like. The brain responds by seeking more of that rush, which leads us to the perpetual cycle that is mindlessly scrolling for hours on end.
If you’re skeptical of my conclusions of the detriments of social media and smartphones I want you to consider the following question: Is it at all concerning to you, that Steve Jobs (Apple), Bill Gates (Microsoft) Sundar Pichai (Google), and Evan Spiegal (Snapchat) limit the screen time that their children have at home? In 2011, a year before his death, Jobs foresaw the growing problem of tech addiction in the United States. He said in a New York Times interview that he would not allow his kids to have an iPad after it was released.
If the leaders of the top 3 tech companies in the world won’t allow screen time abuse in their homes, I believe that you deserve to know of the potential harms to your psychological well being. For more information on the dangers of screen time and social media, check out one of my previous posts.
So, what are some actionable steps you can take in order to minimize pointless screen time? There are plenty of logical solutions, such as deleting apps or leaving your phone in the other room: None of which completely remove the urge to stay constantly updated on everything that isn’t in front of you. With that being said, what does work?
Let me tell you about some of the best practices I have learned and implemented in my life that have boosted my productivity, increased my attention span, and allowed me to truly gain control of my conscious mind without the uncontrollable urge of checking a screen every 5 minutes, or having wandering thoughts when I’m trying to get important tasks done.
These practices should be implemented daily in order to see results. Make sure you begin these habits with the proper intention in mind. You must be committed to being more productive, reserving judgement until you truly have put in the necessary effort to transform your life through better habits. After all, the quality of your life is dictated by the quality of your daily habits.
Here Are The Four Habits to Improve Your Daily Life
Win Your First Hour:
In my personal daily routine I avoid opening messages, social media, or emails for the first 3 hours of my day. I wake up every weekday at 5AM in order to incorporate some quality “me” time before the duty of my responsibilities call. Don’t get discouraged, I didn’t execute this drastic reduction in screen time overnight. At first it was difficult, and there were setbacks along the way. However, perseverance has yielded incredible results.
For reference, while I was in college my average screen time was between 6–7.5 hours DAILY. Just thinking about that now is nauseating and disappointing. For 4/5 years of my college tenure I was a full time student and part time employee at three 3 different companies. The only way I was able to maintain that amount of screen time was by always having one eye on my phone.
Having that much daily screen time can only mean that I was never focused on any task at hand, whether it was studying, class, or working my excess screen time was only permitting me to maintain partial focus and effort in the most important areas of my life. Partial focus and effort yields partial results and takeaways.
So how was I able to reduce the time spent on my phone? Let’s start with this, it wasn’t a short term fix. 6 months after graduating I am floating around 3 hours of screen time daily. While I’d like to reduce this number to less than 2 hours that may not be realistic as my entrepreneurial path in social media means that I do have an obligation to be on these platforms that I warn against here.
With that being said, your morning routine is indicative of how productive the rest of your day will be. I attribute most of my reduction to implementing what Robin Sharma calls the 20/20/20 rule in The 5 A.M Club. The 20/20/20 rule simply states that in the first hour of your day, upon rising from sleep, you should spend the first 20 minutes moving your body, the next 20 minutes meditating, gratitude journaling and goal setting for the day ahead, then using the last 20 minutes of that first hour either reading or listening to something educational (audiobooks or podcasts). For a more detailed description of the 20/20/20 rule you should read the aforementioned book.
That rule alongside the other tips and practices Sharma shares are great for personal production and greater efficiency. He encourages readers to adapt the 20/20/20 rule to fit what works for you. It may take a couple days to figure out what works best for you, and don’t rule out the possibility of it changing in the future. The beauty of the tips Sharma relays to readers is that they are dynamic and adaptable.
My personal adaptation of the 20/20/20 rule is as follows: at 5:00 AM my alarm goes off and I immediately force myself up. If I lay there for any period of time the likelihood of me starting my day off correctly immediately plummets. After getting out of bed I either do push ups, lunges on my way to brush my teeth, or jumping jacks in order to get an immediate blood flow. The blood flow part is essential because it gets rid of the groggy feeling in the eyes that is natural when you wake up with the sun.
The main goal here is to raise your heart rate. It is scientifically proven that cortisol, the hormone responsible for fear and anxiety, are at their highest in the morning right when we wake up. Moving your body immediately after rising promotes elevating your heart rate, which reduces cortisol levels from the moment you wake up! (The 5 A.M Club)
After I’m done brushing my teeth I immediately start my meditation process. I use the Headspace app as it has strengthened my practice and has numerous additional benefits when used consistently. After a 15 minute meditation period I physically write down 5 things that I am grateful for whether it be generally speaking or from the previous day. Then I write down 5 tasks or goals that I want to accomplish in the upcoming day. This part is absolutely essential and should NOT be overlooked. Writing down 5 things to be grateful for promotes the flow of serotonin, which regulates anxiety, mood, and happiness. The 5 tasks are also important because it acts as a liaison between intention and execution of what is important to you from the very beginning of your day.
The final 20 minutes of the hour are spent reading something informational or educational. Avoid newspapers the televised news, and social media. (My personal recommendation is The Science of Success podcast if your prefer listening to reading.) After this I head to the gym to get a workout in. This is what makes the recommended one hour off your phone turn into 3 hours for me. Gym time accounts for 1/2 of my three hour routine. As previously stated, the elevation of heart rate lowers cortisol levels. My process incorporates a raised heart rate twice in less than 2 hours. In my experience, this is what has helped the most during my morning routine’s transformation.
This simple breakdown takes some time to get used to, but the results are phenomenal. Happier, fulfilled, and productive days are the results of a determinant consistency in implementing this morning ritual in whichever way fits your lifestyle best.
Alternate Methods:
- Feel free to change the order of the 20/20/20 rule. If you enjoy implementing the techniques in some other variation, do that. I would recommend raising your heart rate ASAP.
- Reading a book can be substituted with an informational podcast or even an audiobook.
- Headspace is optional, but if you are new to meditating like I am, it truly makes a world of difference.
- 20 is a somewhat arbitrary number that should be viewed as a floor rather than a ceiling. You can spend more time on any individual aspect of the routine. For example: I spend closer to 40 minutes reading.
Make Time for Quiet Time:
Whenever we are in the deep flow of work it can get very easy to take a break by checking social media or something else for a distraction from our important tasks. I challenge you not to take your first break of the day on your phone. Instead, find somewhere in your home or office to spend some time alone and in silence, where you won’t be interrupted by people or your phone.
This has become essential for me. I can’t make a recommendation for how much time to spend since my personal practice caries greatly. I sometimes spend only 5 minutes in solitude, while on other days I have spent as much as 35 minutes in dead silence. You can be sitting or laying down, whichever feels best for you. Enter your quiet time with the intention of refreshing the mind and getting back to work recharged and ready to tackle your day’s objectives. Maintain a loose focus on your surroundings and contemplate on the task at hand prior to beginning your (now) mandatory quiet time. With time and practice, you will be able to listen to and understand your body’s needs. There are days where I only need 5 minutes to get a quick recharge, there are days it takes 30. Each day is it’s own monster so get to know yourself and listen to your mind and body’s responses to your time spent in solitude. You will eventually be able to know the exact instance of when your quiet time is entering diminishing returns.
This break has often allowed me to get up and finish my tasks promptly. This practice also promotes a mental clarity and focus for the rest of your day. Once it becomes a habit you will be inclined to do it more than once in a day, which is totally normal and still effective. Use this practice to gain a midday surge of focus and energy.
Additional Pointers:
- If you try quiet time for a couple days and need some variety, listen to upbeat and happy music for ten minutes. Songs that make you feel good, make you feel good. Even if it’s just two songs in a row, it can have a positive impact on your day and promote a great mood that will help you in other areas of your life.
- I have used Headspace for this time as well. There are many services additional services you can use on Headspace that will have you feeling refreshed in just 10 minutes!
Spend Time in Nature:
Since we are highly functioning and conscientious beings it becomes easy to forget that we are, at our very core, animals. There is scientific evidence that suggests that just being outside will boost serotonin levels . This means improved mood and mental clarity as mentioned above. (Again, if you want more detailed information on the actual scientific research refer to Brain Wash.) Spending uninterrupted time outside is another way to quickly cleanse your busy mind in a way that will enable you to be more productive for the rest of your day.
Take the time to appreciate the beauty of the world we live in. Oftentimes we spend our days indoors when our inherent nature as animals is to be outside. I choose to focus on the ambient noise when spending time outside. This is my preferential way of mental recharge. It can be as simple as sitting on a bench outside or going for a quick walk. I normally walk around and spend some time looking at the flowers in my backyard or the surrounding trees. Another popular method of implementing this is to go for a daily walk! This also promotes a healthy physical lifestyle by burning some additional calories. This is a quick and easy way to make the most of you recharging time. Time is valuable, so the ability to knock out two birds in one stone with a brief 10 minute walk should not be ignored!
Additional Pointers:
- As with our quiet time, you will get to know yourself better as each day passes in terms of how much time you need outside to feel refreshed. For the best results, leave all digital distractions inside and embrace your time in solitude (or with a colleague) for as long as you need to in order to get a full recharge of the mind spirit.
Win Your Last Hour:
Your last hour is almost of equal value and importance of the first hour of the day. I view the hour preceding bed as my routine to get ready for the following day. Adopting this mindset has shifted my perspective to viewing my nightly ritual as a sacred routine that is not to be dismissed.
Exposure to blue light is typically at its highest in the hours preceding bed time. The social media apps, Netflix, or the news are sure fire ways to absolutely tarnish all the working progress of the day you had if you are implementing the first 3 techniques that I have given.
Blue light is proven to aid insomnia, as well as anxiety, decreased attention span and subconscious fear. Having this knowledge, why would you choose to inflict this damage before the very important hours of rest you need in order to operate as your best self every single day? It’s nonsensical. You wouldn’t deflate your own tires before a road trip, so why are you deteriorating your mental functionalities before your workday or other important days? Make sure you have an hour before your bedtime where you are detached from all things electronic, especially those that emit the oh so dangerous blue light I have been warning about.
Some of the same practices used in your first hour can be used in your last hour to maintain your mental efficiency and capacity. My nightly routine consists of documenting on a notepad what I did in the day. I’ll do my best to recall how I spent my time and reflect on what I did well vs. where I could have used my time better. I’ll try to document my social media usage so I know where my time is being spent productively on social media vs when I’m just looking for a bite of entertainment to fill a void. This reflection period is important to me because it allows me to focus on the good of the day as well. It is a method of accountability that forces you to not waste your time throughout the day on things that are unfulfilling. It also allows you to practice gratitude on days where things just seemed to go your way. This is truly an effective way to be grateful and promote happiness before bedtime.
After this practice I go back to reading. This is where I get the bulk of my reading done. So far this year I have read 18 books mostly relating to psychology and personal development. The constant reading provides me with motivation and insight that refuels my desire to keep improving myself, for myself, my relationships, my business partners, and for my greater causes in life.
If you’re reading this and wondering how the hell you’re gonna find the time to do this, I wondered the same thing when I first stumbled upon these practices. A busy 9–5, children, business, and other obligations of our lives can make it difficult to incorporate these practices daily. However, you will never be able to show up for others if you can’t show up for yourself.
The daily routine of some of the greatest leaders, thinkers and entrepreneurs of the world included MAKING time for themselves, with the intention of making sure they were capable of performing well for their cause and their people.
If you find yourself thinking that there’s no way to make time for yourself because you’re so busy and your schedule is too compacted, ask yourself: Are you ever too busy driving to stop for gas when your emergency light is on? You wouldn’t keep driving if your car is low on fuel no matter how important it was to get to your destination. The greatest people of all time made sure to fill their champagne glass at the top of the tower before overflowing to those beneath them.
This applies to you as well, no matter how big or small your glass, and no matter how many glasses are beneath you.
I truly hope that these practices, whether you implement them all, or start with one, will help you as they have helped me. If you have any questions in regards to this post you can always ask me in the comments below, on facebook, and on instagram. I will always take the time to help you.
