Grateful and Greedy for Understanding Silence

a poem about needing people and needing to not talk to them

Photo by Andraz Lazic on Unsplash

One Hundred Days of Gratitude. Thirty.

More than most things, most days (these days)
I wish I could tell those patient people
that I’m okay
without it sounding a little like
a lazy lie

some nights

on top of everything, maybe don’t
look me in the eye

some nights

a little too long.
A little too hard to hide.
Laugh at this
joke.
Listen to this
song.

Life is going
well, well moving along
ask anyone. Never needed
sun. No really

the ghost
is still enough
for most

some nights

I’m fine —
as a matter of fact,
now I think I matter,
so there’s that’s something

some nights

more than most things,
I want those safe harbors, safe houses, house parties, and hospitals
to understand that even when they don’t
hear from me

some nights
or most nights
or more.

It’s only because of them, some nights, that I know what it’s all for.