How Can You Have Love Without Losing Yourself: 7 Ways to Set Clear Boundaries your Partner Will Respect
The roadmap to healthy relationships
Your relationship was going fine a month ago.
Or so you thought?
You realize you were never honest from the beginning. You never let yourself be vulnerable or free. And regret hangs like a cloud over your relationship. Now everything seems like it is over.
You feel more stressed and frustrated lately.
And deep inside, you know the honeymoon ship has left the harbor.
We sacrifice a lot in our relationships, forgetting where to draw the line. Before we realize it, we have lost our values, our happiness, and our essence as a people.
Is there a way to have love without losing too much?
Absolutely.
Here are seven ways you can set boundaries without losing love, values, or happiness:
Communicate Honestly
There is a fear of bursting that new love bubble. To avoid confrontations or conflict, you suppress your emotions or lie.
Be clear and transparent about how you feel. Let yourself go and show a bit of vulnerability to build trust as well as intimacy.
For instance, if you dislike public displays of affection, be honest with your partner. Otherwise, you will harbor more resentment each time you are in public.
Journal Everyday
If you struggle to pass your points across or feel like your complaints fall on deaf ears, you’re probably frustrated and feel like giving up.
So write them down. Every morning, find a quiet spot and pour out your feelings. Journaling helps you to write without the frustrations of not being heard.
How do certain things/situations make you feel? What aspect of your relationship makes you uncomfortable? What issues make you exhausted? Did your partner do something that hurt you?
Make Decisions with a Clear Mind
The choices you make when experiencing extremes of emotions like happiness, anger, love, embarrassment, pain, excitement, and fear are usually reckless and risky.
Cultivate the habit of carefully evaluating the pros and cons of all the points presented in every situation. Talk it over with someone you trust before making any decisions.
You will discover that the initial excitement of traveling halfway across the world to meet your partner fades at the thought of your bank account.
Understand your Love Languages
It is depressing when you are in a relationship, but your emotional needs are unsatisfied. The odds are that you and your partner have different love languages.
Discussing how you both show and receive love is vital. Ask your partner to explain if you do not understand and try to see your love languages meet.
A few compatible ones are quality time, words of affirmation, and physical touch. Acts of service and gift-giving can happen at the same time.
Observe your Partner’s Mannerisms
Do you fail to understand your partner’s non-verbal cues? It signals your lack of attention or unwillingness to consider how your actions affect your feelings.
Be attentive to their non-verbal signals. Watch out for facial expressions, the tone of their voice, and inconsistencies in behavior, and ask questions.
Does your partner behave weirdly when you say or do something a certain way? Did he clench his fists after you laughed during a serious conversation? Did she smile when you arrived late for your date but did not call?
Evaluate your Values And Needs
When your relationship lacks guiding principles, it may not withstand crises that would have otherwise strengthened the trust between you and your partner.
Take time to access your core beliefs side by side to see the point where they meet. Study your partner to understand where their needs coexist with your values.
It is vital you are confident and trust that your partner will support you in your beliefs.
Prioritize All Aspects of your Life
When you get caught up in your relationship, more often, it’s easy to lose all other aspects of your life, like friends, family, work, and hobbies.
Have a limit on the amount of time you spend together. Use the 70/30 or 60/40 rule. Spend 70 percent with your spouse and the remaining 30 on other things. This time depends on the level of your relationship.
Always be clear on when you need space and designate time for other activities. Go on a solo vacation or a girls’ night out when overwhelmed.
Now.
Imagine you’re in a relationship full of love and mutual respect with boundaries that favor you and your partner and keep the relationship afloat.
You close your eyes at night worry-free because you know someone has your back. Your relationship has helped you grow in ways you did not fathom.
It is only possible when you can set boundaries. It does not matter if your relationship is at the beginning, middle, or ending.
Set those boundaries today and see your relationship thrive.
