How to Accidentally Live Abroad and Love It
Could happen to anyone.
I’ve been riding the rollercoaster that is island life in Phuket, Thailand, for 14 weeks now. “Are you living there now?!” people ask me. “No no… Yes! I’m not sure.” I answer, aware of how odd it sounds to live a life blowing in the wind, staying for as long as happiness and visa rules coincide.
I live (ha, I said it! Freud would clearly make me tick the ‘resident’ box) on a rambling, low key, relatively rural street. The absolute flashiest place nearby is a little 3-star, jungly hotel called CocoVille that serves oatmeal pancakes and plays the same elevator piano music YouTube playlist every morning, enticing people in for the strong coffee, (pancakes, but only about once a month… because I’m pretty sure the secret ingredient is bricks), and decent Wi-Fi.
Would you like a side of octopus?
More common staples on the street include motorbike sidecars with portable barbeques, selling a range of unidentifiable meat on skewers and tiny papery octopi (squid?) carcasses, lovingly clipped to little rails; juice shacks — actual bamboo/straw shelters with a greater range of tropical fruit than most British supermarkets have ever seen, with MOUNDS of fresh ginger and knobbly carrots (side story — my fav juice shack is also home to a small Pomeranian-esque furball of a dog that is generally kept in the fridge to keep it cool, no joke); kickboxing glove shops — there’s about ten on the one street, with a kaleidoscope of coloured mitts in the window, and massage parlours (easily identifiable by the rows of little massage beds divided by shower curtains, and smell of industrial strength Tiger balm). The curiously named “Golden Fingers” is the most famous — that place probably deserves a blog post all to itself.
Never a dull moment
Last week a ten-foot python was captured on the street, trying to sneak into a clothes shop. I didn’t see it personally, but its mugshot did the rounds on the ‘Gram, four smiling Thai guys each proudly holding up a loop of snake belly. I don’t know how that chapter ended, but with lots of barefoot little kids playing on the street, I’m guessing the Thai guys probably booted the python over the rainbow bridge. :(
Anyway! Fourteen weeks in, and it felt like time for a bit of a summary/reality check/inventory of the journey so far. I’ve been living abroad off and on since I was 18, and like to think not too many things surprise me now, but gosh, even by Lexie standards, it’s been a mad three months.
Nothing to see here, all totally Phuket-typical (type B normal)
Those three short months have seen: three hospital visits and thirteen clinic visits (definitely more accident prone than usual), two snakes (but not mega-pythons so it’s okay), one scorpion (small, but in my room — not okay), one Noah’s ark style flash flood, one exploding pylon/giant electricity transformer as we drove past (taxi driver swerving fireball), a couple of total power outages (the whole street, one time), oh — one small crocodile, and my first DIY handheld firework/mini rocket launchers (which only cost 20 baht, or 47 pence, for the thrill of possibly blowing your hand off, possibly creating shooting stars! What a roulette!).
I’m still also holding down my 9–5 “office” job that I was doing before the world went pear-shaped. Everyone else returned to the office post-pandemic, which makes meetings… interesting! Needless to say, all of the above has livened up my (mobile) office environment NO END!
Because we like lists…
But hopefully all of this hasn’t stolen my actual blog post’s thunder, because I wanted to write about 8 of the most unexpected things about living(!) in Thailand:
1. The people you meet
This has to be #1, because it’s mind-blowing. On a daily basis. How this range of fascinating, spectacularly diverse people have gathered, from all corners of the globe, on this one little fitness-obsessed street in the arse end of nowhere, Phuket, is beyond me. But it’s an incredibly special thing. Once you’ve experienced this place, you’re guaranteed to be back, and most people (like me) are drawn back again and again for the heady concoction unique to this place.
2. The animals you meet
For someone who has never particularly liked cats OR dogs, it must seem to my friends on social media like I’ve practically turned into a St Francis wannabe. But you’d basically have to be dead inside for the furballs around here not to tug on your heartstrings. The strays are so intriguing, in their street-wise, independent… I might schmooze your legs and let you pet me today but tomorrow I’ll snarl and pretend I never knew you kind of way. There’s a little grey cat with cancer that lives on my balcony [tear-filled heart eyes emoji]. Enough said.
3. The sheer insanity that is digital nomadery
I am never anything less than super appreciative that I have the opportunity to work remotely… but I still haven’t quite wrapped my head around how mad it all is. We have the pandemic to thank for a huge shift in work norms. The other day I paused to answer some pressing emails in the middle of a boxing ring. Today I took a conference call from a field of palm trees. I honestly don’t think I work any less diligently than I did in the office, in fact, out of guilt that I’m in a nice place, I probably work more. It’s nuts, and somehow feels like it shouldn’t be possible. I love it. I’m exceptionally grateful.
4. Scooter life
Perhaps totally normal to many of you, but not to me! The mind still boggles when I’m cruising along at 50kph (I know I knowww, easy there tiger WOAH! I am an unashamed granny driver) with nothing between my skin and the blur of the tarmac. Most foreigners have no insurance, don’t wear helmets (yeeek, the horror — actually gives me chills when I see them ragging a sports bike without one), and things like traffic lights seem to be very much optional/common sense-based here. It’s an education! I love the freedom and the open air! But not the monsoons.
5. Health stuff
It’s been a bit of a weird/unlucky few weeks — sports injuries (who knew about bone bleeds!), infected cuts, and some evil poison-infested prawns, but the health system here — well, the private side — is jaw-droppingly impressive. Multi-lingual medical staff, first-rate, immaculate facilities, little to no waiting times, and plentiful donut shops — which makes hurting yourself all worth it really! Incidentally, Thai pharmacies are VERY lax on the old doling out of the drugs as well. Seems that nothing needs a prescription. You have to be careful you don’t accidentally take something meant for knocking out a horse.
6. Quandaries Abound
I suppose I’m partly writing this because I’m a bit homesick. I’ve no idea where for (not sure where/what home is anymore!). Maybe it’s more “who” for? (Whooom for? Hm. It’s 1am, forgive my alternative grammar.) Island life is an incredible ride, and I’m for the most part happier than I’ve been in a long time, quite possibly writing one of the best chapters of my life! But it comes at a bizarre, instability-becomes-the-norm price. I deeply miss my closest people, and the comfort in knowing they’re just around the corner with a cup of tea (or 2 bottles of wine and 2 straws).
7. On the flip side, homeliness!
That said, it’s incredible how familiar and homely this tiny part of the island has come to feel! I went away just for one night on Sunday. The taxi trip away filled me with a strange, nervous pit in my stomach as my haven disappeared into the distance. Even though I had a fantastic time away, the feeling of walking back into my little super budget hotel, being greeted by the kindest staff, opening the door to my little sunlight-filled room and seeing my few belongings hanging up, filled me with a gratifying sense of belonging and security. I’m starting to know this one street like the back of my hand, and as an antidote to recent chaos, it’s a lovely and surprising feeling!
8. Carpe diem is EVERYWHERE
It’s possible it’s the tropical weather. Could be that this street is full of GREAT fitness places; could be the aforementioned globetrotters who all assemble here with contagious training goals and stories, could just be the “f*** it, I’m on holiday!” feeling that propels you into lost-sight-of-the-comfort-zone territory, but carpe-ing the diem just seems so much easier here! I mostly wake up feeling like the world is a sparkly oyster and that I can do ANYTHING I PUT MY MIND TO. Like I’ve been subconsciously plied with Arnie motivational vids in my sleep. I’m not sure what’s going on, but I bloody love it. And that’s why I’m staying put for the time being!
All I can add, is that if you ever get the chance to venture abroad for more than a holiday, do it, do it do it. Grab it with both hands! You never know where it might lead. I only planned to come here for 10 days on a layover back from Singapore. If you’re nervous about taking the plunge, drop me a note and I’ll gladly talk you through those early ‘there’s a baby scorpion in my room’ or ‘my toilet isn’t sure if it’s actually a shower’ moments.
I’ve no idea what I’m doing here really, but we only get one shot at this life thing, and I’ll happily hang onto this white-knuckle Thailand chapter of the ride by my fingernails for as long as I can. I’d love to hear your travel/accidental living abroad stories too; hit me up in the comments! Remote high-five from Phuket, where I, and a horde of tiney, bitey (UNINVITED) ants, are off to bed. G’night from all of us.
