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How To Get Out Of The Euphoric Recall Cycle

Dee
ILLUMINATION
Published in
4 min readJun 4, 2024

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As I was writing My Past Series, I found myself in a state of obsession to complete my story.

One title kept leading to another as I would recall memories I thought to pen down. This kept happening until 11 entries had been published and I still haven’t entered my recovery stage!

I had wanted to write my past in sequence so readers could enjoy it with effortless flow.

I wanted it to be perfect.

But it’s taking too long.

I only just managed to write about my introduction to drugs, not yet the abuse.

When will I get to the recovery part of my story?!

I was feeling overwhelmed and frustrated with myself.

As I was writing, I began to get stuck in my own euphoric recall of my relationship with Josh — wanting to just write about it, article after article.

I was stuck in my own mind. Re-living all the good times in my head, not able to move forward. I lost my purpose.

So what is EUPHORIC RECALL?

It’s JUST remembering the good moments. It’s all the love bombing stuff — that magical connection that you’ll never again have.

I kept going there and remembering all the happy moments I had with Josh. And every time I go there, it skews my vision more and I think — I want it ALL BACK!

It’s like chasing a high.

Addicts, like me in particular, struggle with euphoric recall.

I didn’t even realize what I was doing until a dear Medium friend pointed it out to me.

The relationship with Josh had long ended. I thought I was over him. That I had moved on with my life.

Yet here I am, caught in my own web of memories.

This scared me senseless.

I needed to revisit my YouTube Guru on victims of narcissistic abuse — Dr Ramani Suryakantham Durvasula. She is an American clinical psychologist I stumbled upon in 2021 and got instantly hooked on.

Her tireless explanation on the narcissist traits and how it impacts its victims helped shed light on my own past. She aided my healing journey.

I decided then to follow her advise by going no contact with Josh and adopting grey-rocking when dealing with my father.

Back to cutting euphoric recall, according to Dr Ramani, here are some ways to to get back to your own reality;

1.DISTRACTION

Pick up a good book and get engaged with the story.

Perhaps a change of scenery like going out for a walk with family members. Or having a conversation with a trusted friend.

Anything to distract the mind from thinking about your past.

Maybe start a new art project!

2.MINDFUL AWARENESS

Using all 5 sensory, see what is in front of you. Take in all the colors, the smell, what you hear. Perhaps you can even taste the air?

This helps recenter your mind to what is happening right in front of you.

3.BREATHING EXERCISE

Take deep breaths and exhale slowly. Emptying your lungs and filling them up back again on repeat.

This exercise, when done correctly, will calm the mind. It gets rid of the nervous energy surrounding you.

4.MAKING AN ‘ICK LIST’

I find this most useful as my mind keeps pulling me to the good times and I need to realise that thats not all there was.

There were plenty of bad times that my mind conveniently forgot. Having that list reminds me what I was idolising isn’t the whole truth and if I was given the chance to relive it again, would I still want to when I see things more clearly for what it was?

I’d like to add to Dr Ramani’s list with one of my own;

5.GRATITUDE

Being out of a toxic relationship for a few years now, I got complacent. I started taking all that I currently have forgranted.

Then, I wouldnt be able to spend my time so freely with my children. Having to schedule my days around Josh or my dad. Now, I am free to decide how I spend my time.

Not too many rules I have to follow. Now, I can exert boundaries. I can do most things without walking on eggshells. My little wins in life!

I hope you find this piece insighful to help end your euphoric recall cycle and come back to your reality.

Don’t miss out on your current happy lives to live in your head wishing for something that isn’t the complete truth.

Lots of love,

Dee

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Dee
ILLUMINATION

I'm all about mental, emotional & spiritual wellbeing ^_^