How to keep going when YOUR REALITY constantly f*cks you up
4 real reasons and 5 solutions
Yep. It’s about your reality. Not your parents’ reality, not your friends’ reality, and not your girlfriend / boyfriend’s one.
Your reality and experiences you encounter are very subjective, and the thing that creates them, is none other than your own mind. And you don’t even realize that.
I won’t tell you my story, and how I learned about mind’s power, because my experience has nothing to do with you. All those bullshits in which someone tells you their stories, and then you feel empowered and motivated, and you think you can move mountains… are as temporary as your life. The only difference is that your life lasts for about 90–100 years, and those stories last for about a month in your mind. So you constantly have to feed your mind with others’ realities.
Let’s dive into some harsh reasons why “everything is so hard”, than I’ll tell you what worked for me… maybe will work for you as well.
You’re still sleeping
I don’t have money to start that business. I have kids to raise. I don’t have the skillset. There is so much competition and many people are way better than me.
Weeeeell… guess what? You’re right. Many people are better than you, and always will be. What can you do about that? You think this is hard? Think twice. The “hard” is in your mind. Everyone has “this hard”… everyone has his own struggle… everyone has the same competition as you.
You don’t have money for your business? Learn how to attract and use others’ money for your idea. You don’t have the skillset? Everything is free on the internet. You have kids to raise? JK Rowling wrote Harry Potter in the night, when her daughter felt asleep.
You can either find excuses, or solutions. Is up to you.
You don’t even know yourself
You want to keep going in what you do, but don’t know even why? Well… it’s like forcing your motivation to commit suicide every day, over and over again.
If you want to do something, maybe art, or business, or sports, or whatever, the first thing you have to do is to figure it out WHY you want to do it. Your WHY is the most important question you have to figure it out for yourself, before even starting.
And this leads me to —
You like the idea of doing something, not doing the thing
Unfortunately this is one of the greatest problems to teenagers.
I heard many people saying that they want to go to Hollywood to become filmmakers, or to write the next Harry Potter, or to become the next Bill Gates.
Just words. When things get harder, they quit. Some people quit before even starting. They love the idea of being at Hollywood, having money, and a nice house, but when they start working they quickly realize they don’t like doing that thing, they like the idea of having the reward.
You want to change the world, and can’t even change yourself
Maybe you have a dream. You think big. You want to accomplish big things. Nothing wrong with that. Should be proud of your dreams.
Are you waking up early? Are you disciplined enough to commit every day, or every week, to whatever you want to do? Are you able to put STOP to your mind when it starts telling you “it’s hard; you should sleep more; I’m hungry we should take a break; let me procrastinate just a little more”? Can you put stop to that?
For everything you want to do, you need some quantity of creativity in solving problems. If your mind is full of scenarios, not only it will get tired by creating stories and realities, but you won’t even have enough room for your creative ideas because your brain it’s already full of garbage.
You speak waaaaay to much about what you WANT
Here’s a nice thing I heard somewhere on Youtube Shorts: whenever you speak out what you want to do, all that energy and drive to do that thing will be exhausted, because you sent it outside of your body, to other entities.
I know, maybe this comes as a contradiction of all the spiritual gurus that says: you have to speak out everyday to attract it. Well, the thing is, you have to speak it out in front of the mirror, because these words will be mirrored to you and YES, YOU WILL ATTRACT IT.
If you speak out in front of others, all that energy will be sucked by others, and you won’t feel you really want to do it anymore.
Maybe you resonate with some of the reasons, maybe you don’t resonate at all. That’s okay. Here are some things that worked for me in shaping my own reality:
1. Erase the word “WANT” from your vocabulary
This word is the most dangerous word for me, and the main thing that kept me from reaching my full potential. And there are two reasons for that.
First, the word WANT imply the positive and the negative as well. You want to do something, but you don’t know if you can. My advice is to replace the verb “TO WANT” with “WILL”.
“You don’t want to become a writer, you WILL become a writer.”
“You don’t want to open a business, you WILL open a business.”
See the difference? When I see you so confident, I take you seriously. Because despite of all the obstacles, YOU WILL DO IT.
And second, “WANT” is a word os indecision. It sends your subconscious mind signals that you didn’t take the decision yet, and your brain — trying to find the most comfortable way — it tells you that you will not do it.
2. Someone’s recipe = someone’s reality
When you take someone’s recipe of doing whatever you wanna do, you actually will attract his flaws and life lessons as well. There is a reason why he got so far. That person you idolise, comes from a different experience, sees life different and maybe he had other flaws than you. And in order for him to succeed, he had to learn some lessons on the way.
Don’t try to learn the same lessons as him/her. What works for me, will not work for you and vice versa. It is okay to be inspired by someone, but don’t try to go on someone foot steps, because everyone’s lessons are different.
3. Act in the present
Decisions baby. Lots of them.
Many of us try to act in the present while thinking too much in the future, and still feeling the past experiences. This is not the present. These are just your uncontrolled thoughts.
Past cannot be changed, but can be understood. Take what’s good and move on. Future cannot be understood, but can be created. So the only moment in which you take a decision is NOW.
4. Control your damn emotions
The fact that you are here reading this, means that you have insecurities and you feel that nothing is going to work. All these feelings are created by your thoughts and all these thoughts became habits over time.
Whenever you feel down, you start feeling all those insecurities and you come here to read motivational bullshits that last few days.
Slap yourself for 2 times, take a cold shower, and reprogram your mind. Learn how to be aware of your thoughts and question every thought you have. You can also read some nice authors and professors, like Tony Robbins, Joe Dispenza, Jim Kwik.
5. Don’t take life too seriously
When you become so obsessed by what you’re doing, you don’t even remember why you started in the first place.
Life has only one destination… one door you are heading to, and it’s called death. That’s the only destination we’re going, either you accept it or not.
Everything that’s in between the moment you are born and the moment you will die, is just a voyage. And depends on you if it will be a fun voyage or an awful one.
CONCLUSIONS
Start to work on you, because either you like it or not, you’re alone in this. Your life is about you. No one will come to push you from behind.
And take it in your own rhythm. Everyone has his own time. While some people are roses that grows in just few months, some people are like bamboos, they grow inside the soil for two years, than in one month they rise 9m above the earth.
Maybe you are a bamboo. Maybe you have to prepare yourself little more for that success that awaits for you. :)
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