How to Write Your Origin Story
Every life has a story, even if most are not yet written. If you have yet to complete yours or even begin, why not start now?
Does the prospect of telling your life story sound overwhelming or even gut-wrenching? If so, let me re-contextualize it. Sharing your story is not an obligation; it’s an offering to the next generation, with fringe benefits of familial connection and the satisfaction that self-reflection brings.
How many of us take a break from being busy or entertained long enough to contemplate our lives — how we got to be the way that we are, the lessons we’ve learned, the milestones we’ve achieved — and the impact these stories could have if we brought them to light? Of course, having an impact is not always good; even a virtue like honesty can strike a blow when used with too much force and not enough tact. What I mean by an impactful story is one that results in a net positive, whether in sharing it with others or writing it for yourself.
You don’t have to be a CEO or a U.S. President to have an impactful story. Who can forget the impact of reading The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank? Writing it most certainly brought the author solace and purpose while enduring one of the most profoundly miserable periods in human history. And then there’s The Story of a Soul, a collection of childhood memories written by 24-year-old Thérèse Martin before her untimely death. The nun known as Thérèse de Lisieux earned her nickname “The Little Flower” for modeling “The Little Way,” a path of simple, practical spirituality based on her lived experience. A modern-day spiritual classic, her life story has been translated into dozens of languages around the world since its posthumous publication in 1898, and it continues to be a source of inspiration for millions of readers, just as Anne Frank’s diary is.
Autobiographies are among the most engaging sources of history, and they also make powerful reads for personal development. While memoirs — nonfiction narratives focused on a time period of theme in one’s life — may not rise to the level of history, many serve as impactful vehicles for promoting understanding of other cultures or unique experiences. From the origin story of a subculture, as told in J.D. Vance’s Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis to the origin story of a mission, as told by my friends Barry and Debora Annino in their memoir, Little Things Matter: A Story of Suffering, Survival and Legacy, personal stories shared by regular people contending with complex challenges or burdens build empathy and wisdom in those who read them.
In the spiritual realm, the inspired writing of religious texts from the great monotheistic traditions provides origin stories for communities bound by shared beliefs. Where the Creation story in the Bible gives Christians a sense of purpose, creating your origin story can help you uncover your life purpose. Setting aside the weighty topics of history and religion, suffice it to say that documenting how you became the way that you are is a gift you create for posterity, and an enriching way to reflect and relive past experiences as you write.
Ultimately, a good origin story is about sensemaking.
Want in? Here’s how to begin:
- Draft or update your professional profile. Writing four to six paragraphs on your professional life, including career milestones and key achievements, enables you to create a brief “life story” for public consumption. The benefit of starting here is you can use this bio in practical life immediately, such as on LinkedIn or in applications for board and service positions. If you find it more difficult than expected, don’t let it frustrate you; this is a good warm-up for the workout ahead.
- Reflect on your professional profile and the hidden experiences you left out. What are the stories between the lines? Why didn’t you include them in your bio? The reason, of course, is that few of us choose to showcase the struggles behind our successes. Consider which of these events or periods in your life might make a compelling story within your story. Keep a list of these topics. One rainy day, you may decide to develop one or more of them into a personal essay or even a chapter in your memoir. (This was the subject of my very first Medium essay in 2019. If you’re reading this, you probably have a few of these yourself!)
- Ask yourself some deep questions without assuming you already know the answer. Start with, “Who am I?” Write down who you think you are in however many words you can muster. Then ask, “What do I value?” Write down your core values. Then ask, “What do I believe?” Write down some core beliefs. Then ask, “Why?” Expect to spend some time here. In fact, this process may take years (it did for me). Even if little of what you write at this stage sees the light of day, venturing to these places will help you uncover specific words and themes to bring detail, nuance, and authenticity to your life story, in whatever form it may take.
You may opt to reverse the above process by starting with reflections on your inner life and building up to the public profile. The point is, in doing the work of contemplating your life and capturing key aspects of it, you will see a unique story arc begin to emerge. Somewhere in all of these words and symbols are the seeds of your origin story, and just getting them out onto a page is a feat. Don’t worry about the end product; this is not one more exercise in productivity. It’s an invitation to get quiet and commune, if only with yourself. Whatever story comes out of it — whether an essay, a chapter, or a memoir — may surprise you, and will no doubt delight any loved ones you choose to share it with someday.
Originally published at https://heirloomdigital.com on February 1, 2023.
