Is unexhibited life NOT worth living?

Jayla Paul
ILLUMINATION
Published in
4 min readFeb 9, 2022

He fell in love with himself at first sight and it is a passion to which he has always remained faithful — Anthony Powell in ‘The Acceptance World’

To live a fuller life, you must love yourself — it’s a trigger to improve self-confidence, self-worth and to be positive every time and everywhere. But does self-love look for acknowledgment?

She fell off the boat. Into the red waters of the lake. The red algae jolting out and the stagnant water getting some action… the adventurous honeymoon couple wanting to do a Titanic embrace for a saucy post on Facebook instead got the taste of sour water.

A lady in silver and black profusely stressed to make the best cocktail as she hosts an evening party — pina-colada in progress. The perfect shot for her Instagram story has her lips kissing the drink. She is a businesswoman who wants to flaunt her bartending skills. Ain’t wearing multiple hats a victory!

An old man fallen head up on a walking track waits for a Samaritan to get him medical aid, but some onlookers have expressed their sympathies with perfect emojis and some even adding creative captions to their post, ‘Our elderly folks are lonely’

Except a secret love affair, everything else indulged even with the slightest of love and excitement is out there as a post on a social media site by the social media addicts who are hungry for acknowledgments and approvals.

Seeking approval through a photo post
Photo by Marc Kleen on Unsplash

What is the new social media ideology?

If they haven’t posted and haven’t received scorecard from fellow friends on their Facebook, Instagram or Snapchat, then they simply haven’t done it. This social media ideology is thickening, and profound bliss of an experience is thinning. Like/Comment scorecards indicate the deal. There is a science to the experiences now — the new classic terms that have sprung up in recent years — FOMO -Fear of Missing out ; JOMO — Joy of missing out, MOMO — Mystery of missing out ,FOJI — Fear of joining in , NEMO Nearly but not fully missing out (the smart one), NOMO No More (still smarter) and YOLO -you only live once (the adventurous)

Awesome, Superb, Great, Stunning, Gorgeous, Amazing …accompanied with cliché emojis of hearts, kiss etc, honestly, I am tired seeing the same responses to these posts over and over since ages. I use them too :) just to belong to a herd ..so the wheel runs on.

What posts could trigger an honest Wow effect ?

I am neither an extreme critique of this exhibitionism nor a conformist so here’s what I would think make a better post..

*Post a rainbow, I haven’t seen it for ages. Of course, be there in the shot ..(now you may think that I am looking for some monsoon spice..No.. Rainbow is symbolic to the many blissful events in nature that people would naturally admire)

*Post a genuine smile that emanates kindness. I can see it in your eyes when you fake it.

*Post the rustic feel of the place you just visited; I will come back to your social media account as a trusted partner for some advisory

*You may flaunt your cleavage or your belly button but post it with a tad grace (if that’s possible).

*When you are watching a sunset on the Indian ocean, we want to see the sunset not how YOU are looking at it.. your silhouette would also invite the same number of Likes or Comments, maybe more…

If a husband loves his wife, it is better off when it is their private matter… but when I see emotional anniversary messages from one spouse to another in the public domain, I am forced to doubt if it’s all real. It makes me naturally suspicious about the insecurity in their marriages. If a husband is popping a lychee into his wife’s mouth and it’s a post put up for feedback, it helps me only with a lychee juice reminder.

Pining for attention and acknowledgment, is contrary to self-love ..

Of course, you have to blow your trumpet to let the world know that you are very much there, and having the blast of a life… but what is it about doing it too often if you are not a public figure? This obsessive attention seeking is an erratic matter of the mind, a state of missing peace? And there is much more — you may be just sending out a wrong message to the deprived hearts who struck by mistaken belief of “everyone else enjoying except me” risks himself into a state of depression.

FOMO reasons are behind the mental health helplines busy buzzing in metro cities during Christmas and New year… the lonely souls unable to party are frantically calling for help. This report is based on data.

I will not be surprised when someday I hear the tragic news of a troubled heart braving a final post on his social media account with a handful of sleeping pills and tagging all of his erstwhile friends who deserted him!

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Jayla Paul
ILLUMINATION

I am excited by merry people and great conversations. In the tech world I am into Digital Transformation and Telecom solutioning..