It’s Not About How Many Friends You Have — It’s About What Kind of Friends

Christian I.
Jul 26, 2020 · 4 min read
Photo by Duy Pham on Unsplash Free from copyright

I was always the loner kid in primary school.

The kid who always sat by himself at lunchtime.

The kid who would always panic when it came time to choose a partner for school projects.

As a child, I didn’t have that many friends. I was the shy and silent type. Reclusive, awkward. . . Choose any adjective in the English Dictionary that matches the archetype quiet kid, and I guarantee it would somehow describe the child Me.

I didn’t have many friends in my early days of school. I made my first friend when I was 8.

I still remember the day clearly.

It was the day that half of our class went out for Wednesday swimming lessons. When I returned to school later in the afternoon, I saw there was a new classmate.

We met, and we became friends.

We both loved the same Playsation 2 games.

We were both fans of WWE.

We both collected football trading cards. And the bonus point was that he lived down the road from me.

The wheels of time have turned, I am now 21, and to this day we’re
still close friends.

I can probably count on two hands the number of friends I’ve had in my lifetime. There’s not that many to name. But for me, this one friend is worth fifty.

When I was a teenager, I was so desperate to make friends. I left secondary school at 16, and I wanted to spend that summer with a large circle of friends.

I watched all these music videos and saw all these Instagram photos of large
friendship groups setting of adventures together. And I remember thinking, ‘I want that.’

Looking back, I see now that the only reason I wanted a large group of friends was to feel less alone. But I’ve since learned that you can be in a room full of people and still feel lonely.

So I began cherishing the small number of friends I had, rather than searching for more.

Sometimes, one brilliant friend is enough—even two or three. What’s important is they are the right friends.

My friends and I don’t go on Instagram-worthy adventures every day, but the bond between us is strong.

What I love most about my friends is that they’re never too busy to talk.

No matter how long it’s been before we last spoke, I never feel
awkward sending them an iMessage out of the blue.

Our conversations can begin with a ‘How are you?’ and slowly erupt into us sharing funny memes, and discussing the meaning of life until morning.

What I cherish most about my close friends is not only that we can
joke freely, but that I can also open up about the things I’m going through
and know that they will encourage me.

My friend teaches me the value of ‘How are you?’ time after time.

‘How are you?’ is a phrase we throw around so loosely.

I say it so much in my life.

I say it to the barrister handing me a cup of coffee.

To the stranger I passed on the sidewalk.

To my colleagues, when I step into the office at work in the morning.

I say it so much, but sometimes I never care about the answer that follows that question.
Every now and then, my friend drops a ‘How are you doing?’ in my inbox.

It’s a small gesture, but when it comes from the heart, it can mean
a lot.

Sometimes, you need friends who are willing to randomly check up on
you.

My friends and I don’t agree on everything.

We often debate on a lot of different topics. Religion, politics, the justice system, whether or not pineapple on pizza should be made illegal? — you name it, we’ve had a debate about it.

What I love about my friends is that they’re never afraid to challenge my beliefs.

It’s easy to stay quiet when you don’t agree with your friends. It’s noble to to challenge the way their think, even if it feels uncomfortable doing so.

I always used to want a large posse of friends.

But now I see that life is not about finding a lot of people who will cross half the journey with you. Life is about finding the special ones who will go with you all the way.

I know I can always rely on my friends for help. And they know they can depend on me, too.

Sometimes, all you need is one brilliant friend who will always go the extra mile for you — a friend who will stick by your side through the ups and downs.

It’s not about how many friends you have: it’s about what kind of friends you have.

ILLUMINATION

We curate outstanding articles from diverse domains and…

Christian I.

Written by

Believer. My name is Christian. I write to escape the busy chaos of everyday life. Trying to understand myself better through words.

ILLUMINATION

We curate and disseminate outstanding articles from diverse domains and disciplines to create fusion and synergy.

Christian I.

Written by

Believer. My name is Christian. I write to escape the busy chaos of everyday life. Trying to understand myself better through words.

ILLUMINATION

We curate and disseminate outstanding articles from diverse domains and disciplines to create fusion and synergy.

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