Neither Straight, Nor Curly
My journey about loving my natural hair
I was always unhappy about my hair, for as long as I can remember. It was neither straight nor curly. It did not fall across my shoulders like the models in the shampoo commercials that I saw on TV. I loved looking at straight hair and could never understand why my hair was never like that, no matter how much conditioner I used. I also admired curly hair. Mine did have a few unruly strands that stuck out, but they were not curls.
My teenage self hated my hair. It was neither straight nor was it curly. I tied back my hair into a ponytail on most days and wore plaits or buns on other days. Without a hair tie, my hair looked like a lion’s mane.
Fast forward to my 20s. I still had the same rough, coarse hair that stuck out in odd places. I did consider straightening every now and then. But the thought of dumping a ton of chemicals on my hair always made me turn back every time. I also knew that permanent straightening was in no way “permanent” and that my natural hair would be back in a few months even after going through the expensive process.
On my wedding day, I wore my hair in a bun with a few face-framing strands as I was unsure if any other hairstyle would suit me. Later on, I bought a couple of straighteners and tried temporarily straightening them at home. This would last only for a few hours. I would always go back to my unruly hair. I detested my hair with each passing day.
And then one day, everything changed. I was now in my mid-30s. I was casually going through a few videos on YouTube when a suggested video caught my attention. It was a video about CGM or the “Curly Girl Method” started by Lorraine Massey on how to take care of textured hair. It was a “Eureka” moment for me. I was finally enlightened. My rough lion’s mane was textured. No wonder it did not fall silkily across my shoulders like those shampoo commercials.
I started falling CGM rules. No dry combing, co-washing, deep conditioning, or using curl creams and gels. I slowly saw my hair transform into beautiful “waves”.
Yes, I was a “wavy” and I never even knew it! Just like how the Ugly Duckling never knew he was a beautiful swan. I never knew I was wavy with beautiful waves.
I fell in love with my hair. I looked at myself in the mirror and loved every wave. I no longer craved silky straight hair or coily curls. My waves were perfect for me and suited my facial features exactly. I did not have to hide them in a ponytail or bun. And finally, the tables turned. Everywhere I went, I was getting compliments about my waves. My big hair, now tamed into gorgeous waves has become my pride.
Very often, we hate ourselves. It could be our hair, facial features, our height, or maybe even how we laugh. However, this could be what makes us unique and sets us apart from the crowd. We don’t need to fit in always, we can stand out and that’s OK.
Is there something about yourself that you hated and then came to love later on? I would love to hear about it in the comments.
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