Re- lation- ship- s
Wondering why did I break the relationships into pieces?
Well! Breaking everything is what has fascinated me lately. Getting rid of things is as necessary as acquiring them is. But this was not what was taught in the early years of life. If you acquire a new thing you must take care of it. It shouldn’t be lost, mishandled, broken, torn, or stained. I remember being gifted a medium-sized teddy bear that had white fur all over with a red heart in front. ‘Love you’ were the words written on that heart. I was a little girl at that time. Since it was white and had the most chances of getting dirty, it was wrapped with a transparent cellophane wrap and put in the showcase in our house. It’s been 20 years now, and the teddy still rests there as it is. I might have used it and made a mess out of it eventually but I was ready to be responsible for it. The love I could have had for it, the annoyance, the pain of fighting with a friend in pre-school, I could have shared everything with it. But forget the life, it’s important to keep things as it is. Don’t use it and therefore you’ll not be able to ruin it.
Growing up, this mentality kept rooting. I didn’t give everything that I could offer and so I never received everything that I could have got. The love, the friendships, the initiatives, the willingness, the chances, the choices.
Bare minimum conversations and bonds were made. Happiness and Pains, both were refrained to be shared. Arguments and disagreements never arouse. Because nothing was felt deeply.
My efforts were directed only to keep everything and everyone in my life as it is. I have to maintain the relationships with myself and everyone else in such a way that they don’t leave me ever. I might try compromising for this. Or I might make peace with this deadly stability. But I must not choose beautiful transformation through a bubble having all the emotions i.e. love, hurt, fear, pain, joy, and anger.
It’s so small of a thing to realize that it could have been missed unnoticed. But I got this share of realization as a gift from God. I guess.
Childhood plays a major part in adulthood. The beliefs we carry from the former phase to the latter is what conditioning is. Family, and society decided for us what to think.
In the title, re-refer to again.
Lation means the act of carrying from one place to another
Ship refers to the vehicle w.i.z. the beliefs
S to pluralize the infinite relationships we have already and more awaiting ahead
The best relationship we can have is with ourselves. We all know this. It’s not a new pearl of wisdom. I was rather surprised to see the results when I myself tried it. This was the only ray of hope which could work. But I had zero faith that it would. But it did!
When you are drowning in suffering, frustration from over thinking, and feeling of regrets, fear, and anxiety, you say yes to even the minutest of anything that radiates hope. So did I.
When we love ourselves, we radiate love outside.
When we are kind to ourselves, we sprinkle kindness outside.
When we console ourselves, we learn to console the ones in need
When we learn to laugh with ourselves, we teach others to laugh a lot more with themselves
When we cry and comfort the self, we become humble to others.
Keep sailing!
