Published in


Success is Subjective. Don’t Let Anyone Tell You Otherwise

A look away from all the pressure the word ‘Success’ has to offer

Photo by Ian Stauffer on Unsplash

Photo by Ian Stauffer on Unsplash

You don’t have to be a millionaire by 20,25

You don’t have to be married by 27

You don’t have to be settled by 30

You don’t even have to have your life figured out by 30 or 40 or 50 or 60. We aren’t that smart!

No one knows what 10 years entails for them, heck I don’t even know what the next 10 days has in store for me, how do I plan out the next 10 years?

People think success is a designated destination, the same for everyone. It’s not!

Not everyone wants a lavish and extravagant life, some people are happier living at a farm, or having a family is enough for them! It really depends on you.

What does success look like for you?

Thinking about the future has overwhelmed me several times

I can’t deny it. It has happened.

It was after listening to people like Gary Vee I thought to myself, maybe I have had the wrong roadmap all this time.

Maybe I have been lied to.

Here is the golden rule I have decided to live by from now on:

Live in the moment

Sounds like a cliche but when you really think about it, it makes a lot of sense.

What are you doing right now? Do it to the best of your abilities. Be fully present in it.

Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like and celebrating it for what it is right now

I have written over 50 articles now, but it still brings the same obstacles for me.

If you sat beside me when I started writing you would see me pull out my phone and waste an hour, mostly more— doing nothing.

It’s normal.

Multitasking is an enemy — I kid you not!

Be totally immersed in what you are doing, try to stay in a flow state. Eliminate all distractions, it would make you so much happier.

Success is Subjective

What I want to achieve and what you want to achieve are totally different things.

The reason people compare themselves to others is simply that they think success is a matter of numbers beside a dollar sign($ —).

What if it’s not?

Maybe we just overcomplicate success. It doesn’t have to be so rare.

Now don’t get me wrong I have some highly audacious monetary goals and I want to reach them, but that doesn’t put me in a position to make fun of someone with less audacious goals.

This is a conversation I witnessed,

“How much money do you want to be earning ideally?”

“$100,000 in a year is a lot for me!”

“That’s it? Hahaha!”

And what does make the goal less audacious?

Is it simply the less ambitious monetary value? Maybe the other person is more audacious in another field than me.

What does success being subjective really mean then?

Well, for me it means doing something you love. But of course, there is that pressure to pay bills, a necessity.

People used to say everything has a demand. It sounded like a cheesy and naive line in the past. But it really is true now.

With the internet being the protected child in every knick and cranny of the world, it is no surprise that really, in fact, everything has a demand.

Some people posting videos of them dancing or dubbing themselves on TikTok happen to be earning more than doctors in some cases!

You can even earn money watching Netflix!

This is the golden age and yes indeed, everything does have a demand!

How do I find my passion?

The reason this has become one of the most searched things on the internet is simply because of societal pressure. Let’s change that!

Let me tell you that finding your passion really is the easiest thing in the world.

All you have to do is make a conscious decision and then know more about yourself.

So how do you get to know yourself more?

For me, the answer was solitude.

And no, I don’t mean locking yourself up in a distant cabin in the middle of nowhere. I mean, spending a few minutes of your day alone, without a phone, without anything.

Just sit and let your mind race, recognise and entertain your thoughts. Hear what you think why you think that.

Unlock your inner wisdom.

Passion is not something you will find on the 80th page of a google search, it is within you and it was always meant to be within you.

Understand yourself, understand your passion.

Another thing that solitude does is, it throws you away from external opinions and manners of thinking. You talk to you and you judge you.

I remember sitting on a sofa doing nothing and staring towards my right. People started staring at me. One person asked me, “Is everything ok?”

I said, “Yeah, why?”

He said, “You’re just sitting…?”


“You’re just sitting….doing nothing, not using your phone, nothing?”

The idea was so weird to him, he was actually confused.

I was speechless.

How can you have a good relationship with yourself, if you don’t spend any time with yourself?

The secret to personal improvement is accepting the way you are and working to reach higher levels from then on.

Work hard on your passion

While people do get lucky and whatever, it is very important that you work on your craft — whatever it is. Practice daily.

The thing with your passion is, it no longer feels like monotonous work, it is a hobby you spend your day dialling into. It is an amazing feeling!

The process is happiness.

Happiness is a direction, not a place

And try different things. Understanding more about yourself is also about doing stuff you didn’t think you would be doing.

Put in consistent efforts for your passion, your hobby, whatever you like to call it, even if they are as small as five minutes a day!

And what if you spend months or years on something but then find out it just wasn’t for you?

Try something new! Who cares if you fail? Why should you? And at the end of the day, you did get to know yourself more.

Just remember, no type of hard work goes to waste.

If consistent efforts don’t pan out the way you expected in the short run, they will in the long run!

So don’t worry about the future. Focus on now.

The key is to be optimistic and act in spite of that evil voice in the back of your head known as self-doubt, then you are well on the way to YOUR success!


So many of us think that we know what we want. In most cases, however, it is the society that has clouded this thinking. Getting to know oneself is essential.

But when you find what it is you enjoy doing, go all-in on it. That is what gives you happiness and indeed what deserves your attention.

The purpose of life is being happy



Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store