The 3 Principles That Build a Strong Story for Life
We all have stories through which we make sense of the world.
When We Need to Add to Our Story
My four-year-old overheard a conversation between my wife and me about a couple getting married and asked, “Who is getting married?”
We turned to him smiling and told him who. My son, of course, had no clue who these two were but, constantly desiring to input some words into any conversation, asked, “Are they going to live in the old people’s apartments?”
We are often gut-busted by the conclusions reached by our inquisitive but hilarious son. This response is seemingly a random thought utterly unconnected to anything. However, it is connected — at least to our son. He has taken the new story about a couple getting married that he has gathered from our conversation. Then, he tried to fit this new information into the story he currently uses to understand the world. This updated story apparently concludes with this couple “going to live in the old people’s apartments.”
This is what we do as humans. We rely on stories to provide a map for navigating this world. Without a story, we have nothing by which to understand new or current information. We would be lost in the wilderness of the universe without them. Stories are vital.
When Our Stories Need to Expand
We were heading out the door to drop off our van for more never-ending vehicle repairs. Observing the signs of vehicle adventure, my one-year-old daughter scurried around the entryway, looking for shoes to put on. She enthusiastically assembled her footwear. She sat upon the bench proud as a peacock; her legs stuck out in the air to display her glorious achievement. I see before me a bright blue boot that belongs to her four-year-old brother on one foot and a silver dress shoe on the other.
In little Wren’s understanding, “get shoes on” simply means to get any footwear you want. There is no nuance to her story of what it means to get ready to leave. This will become more nuanced for her over time as her story receives feedback from the stories her mom and I tell her about the nuances of what shoes to wear. She will add to her story. Wren will construct a greater complexity for the story of getting ready to leave. This is something we all must do as we learn and grow. Our stories, therefore, must have the plasticity to learn and grow with us. If they are too rigid, they can break. Broken stories can be devastating.
When Our Stories Shatter
Sometimes, our stories about how the world should be get broken. When this happens, we either throw out the broken part of the story based on this new reality we have encountered or modify our story to enable it to handle this new situation.
One morning, around 3 am, I was awakened by my wife to the startling news, “The bathroom is flooded!”
Honestly, that undersold the actual situation, which was much worse. I would have rather had a flooded bathroom over a water volcano.
Leaping out of bed like lightning, I raced downstairs and, to my horror, saw what looked to be a river coming from the bathroom out into the kitchen floor. Water geysers were erupting out of the bathtub, toilet, and sink, an unholy trinity of chaos.
The End of Time had come!
I did not have a story to help me understand the situation. I had nothing. This is a terrible place to be as a human. When we don’t have a story for what we are encountering, panic sets in. I was lost at sea, feeling like Odysseus in the grip of an angry Poseidon.
It was an awful morning.
We ended up figuring out how to address this ridiculous situation. It came at a wet, costly, and frigid (it was winter in Michigan) expense. Once the catastrophe was solved, my story of what could happen as a homeowner was forever changed. I never really thought that an extreme situation would happen to me. Clogged toilet or sink, sure, but that’s the extent of it. My story was too small for what was actually possible, and I suffered for it. I now realize what could happen, how to prevent it, and how to handle it quickly if it happened again. My story was broken and replaced with a story that worked.
The Importance of a Strong Story
We need enduring stories for real life.
We need stories that can handle the deep things of life, like death, meaning, origins, purpose, and morality. Christianity is that enduring story. Christianity can encounter these episodes of new information, nuance, and life-shattering events and survive them when other stories simply shatter. More than this, Christianity not only can handle all the world has to throw at it but also gives life to more stories. This is something truly enchanting about Christianity; it endures and enriches the world with more stories.
Let’s tell the story
I created this blog to exercise the ideas that have haunted my mind. This blog will discuss and contemplate story, imagination, formation, Christian education, icons, symbols, pictures, and poetry. Journey with me as we delve into the deep cavernous thoughts of J.R.R. Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, George MacDonald, Malcolm Guite, James K.A. Smith, N.T. Wright, Charles Taylor, and The Holy Scriptures. If you are interested in or hate this content, join the conversation, as I will blog about these subjects and authors every Sunday morning.
