The Favourite Pastime Of Progressives: Shooting at Allies
What is life like in the camp of fairness, kindness, love and everything nice? Come join us, but get ready to jump.
It’s a sunny day over our inclusive Progressive Camp. Soldiers from the Liberal, Feminist, and Vegan squadrons are joined by the Anticolonial and Totally Non-Toxic Men corps for training.
A drill sergeant draws a tiny circle in the middle of the compound and says:
‘All right, you lazy gits, I know you’re all standing around this vast socio-political field having your own worldviews and whatnot, but this very circle is the only rightful place where you can be truly good human beings worthy of our acceptance! In this circle, Wokeness is up to 11! So, get your asses ready and everyone jump straight into it right this moment!’
‘Errr… sergeant, this circle is awfully tiny, are you sure it can’t be at least a bit bigger?’
‘Absolutely not! Are you saying we should compromise on somebody’s rights? What, maybe you’d include taking a plane on routes where a train ride of under 2578km is possible, eh? Throw the whole planet under the bus just so it’s a bit easier for you to jump? Absolutely not! Nobody left behind, it’s the right way or no way, you’re either in that…
