Prose | Youth | Scotland | Illumination

The Mountain’s Shadow

A reverie of youth

Harry Hogg
ILLUMINATION

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Image Creator

The mountain cast a shadow over my days, over my youth, just as surely as it lay across the fells and over the farm on which I lived. Most mornings the swirling sea mist lifted off the fells and licked its way up the rugged, rose-pink granite face where it hung like a shroud till noon.

The mountain’s mass, restricted me as it must have restricted my father and his before him, punished to live on one side of the island while the rest of island life, it seemed, lived on the other.

Ours was the only farm on the western shoreline. On the east side, white cottages with their chocolate box image thatched roofs littered the fells, crossed by dry stone walls like a checkerboard.

Life under the shadow of the mountain was sometimes a lonely existence. I don’t think I spoke a dozen words to a stranger during the winter months. We never had a television set my whole childhood. We tried it one time, but the mountain blocked the signal and Dad took the television back to the shop in Oban.

I climbed the mountain most days to free myself from its capture and to feel the elation of seeing clear across the island toward the mainland, sometimes catching sight of a yacht tacking hard, fighting the wind ‘mid-Sound’ and me waving like a city kid might wave at a passing train. It somehow connected me to something or someone far off and, for a moment, I felt the promise of leaving the mountain’s shadow.

A lifetime later, I return to its shadow just to hear the snowfall and feel protected from the storms that are always coming.

I go home to be reminded of things lost, my youth, the long-ago brightness of eye, shining healthy skin, going unclothed in the moonlight, yes, that impetuous youth, laughter tears shed on summer nights that glistened and shone like seas, the whole unbridled time of youth, running barefoot, with scabby kneecaps knowing nothing of pain.

Those pale December days, waiting for Christmas over the horizon, going to church, whispering, impatient to repeat Amen, Mum kissing my hair, thick as wool, be home for lunch.

What now of youth, all done, worn out.

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Harry Hogg
ILLUMINATION

Ex Greenpeace, writing since a teenager. Will be writing ‘Lori Tales’ exclusively for JK Talla Publishing in the Spring of 2025