The power of proximity
How the People Around Us Shape Our Lives
In our lives, we will approximately meet 80,000 people. However, out of these 80,000, only a few will stay close to us. These few people play a crucial role in shaping our lives.
I’d like to introduce a theory closely related to this topic: Darwin’s theory. Charles Darwin’s study of finches in the Galápagos Islands revealed that the birds’ beak shapes and sizes were closely related to their diets and environments, illustrating adaptation. He observed that finches with beak shapes best suited to their specific food sources — such as large beaks for cracking seeds or slender beaks for extracting nectar — had a higher chance of survival and reproduction. Over generations, these advantageous traits became more prevalent in the population, demonstrating natural selection.
This theory applies to us as well because we all adapt to our surroundings. We often try to fit in with the people around us, but before attempting to fit in, it’s crucial to assess if we truly belong there.
Many of us end up changing ourselves to fit into places where we don’t belong, and this can have drastic effects. Being with the wrong people can damage us emotionally. Someone who has never been treated properly in their group may start to believe they don’t deserve love at all. Another person who has been manipulated may suffer from low self-esteem, while someone who was constantly blamed might become a people pleaser. This illustrates how those close to us can significantly shape us.
You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.
Choosing these people wisely will determine the kind of person you become. Therefore, it’s important never to try to fit into a place where you don’t belong.
