The Problem With Not Being Willing to Win
You’re not kind. You’re scared.
“I shouldn’t do this. He’ll be embarrassed if I win. He worked so hard, and he’s struggling so much. Who am I to take that away from him? And…what will he think of me once he loses?
In my moment of doubt, he cranks my neck to the side and sinks in his fingers to choke me unconscious. You aren’t supposed to feel bad for your opponent in submission grappling, or any kind of serious competition. But I did. And it ruined everything for everyone involved.
The Consequences of Being Too Nice
Imagine you’re fighting your heart out in the activity you care about most. You’re focused, intense, and feel you’re an inch from victory. In a final climactic moment, you give everything you have and pull out the win. You’re elated, and you swell with pride looking at how far you’ve come.
After it’s over, you get a chance to speak to your opponent, and he’s happy for you? He says, “Great job friend. I could tell how badly you wanted this, so I didn’t want to take it away from you. I let up a bit at the end. You deserve it more than I do. Congratulations.”
I don’t know about you, but if my opponent said that, I would feel more disrespected, robbed, and humiliated than if he spat in my face.
