This Is How You Don’t Become Special
Specialness is not external.
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I grew up as a very bright, brilliant and special kid – my parents and school teachers said this. And I also felt that sometimes. Somehow all this charm fades when I reach a stage of consciousness.
I was transferred to another school which was better in academic studies and taught more children. Obviously, that’s why I went there.
Sitting with numerous children, awoke an inner feeling within me. Am I still that boy who was special?
I was sensing that something is missing. And of course there was no one to shake me and pull my feelings outside my mouth.
This leads to me making many mistakes. Those which I don’t regret (part of the game).
However years later now, when I look back I found how far I have come.
You Don’t Need To Feel Special
As I told you, the idea of being special was rooted in our childhoods. It is very close to impressing people, so they would say something, which you will take as words of validation.
Or you could say this – People Pleasing.
Maybe somewhere in our lives, we all have created scenes and scenarios in our minds. Where we say and do something so that people applaud us.
Sometimes we even create some dialogues and scripts which according to us will deliver an impact on someone. And they will reward us with their Words.
The Issue here is – getting validation from someone gives you a temporary feeling of specialness.
So now you are special but for a temporary time phase, and to make yourself special for always. You will try to imitate your previous actions to please people and take validation.
And this is not the end yet…
Dark Side Of Being Special
With the temporary feeling the perks of becoming special gives you something more. You could say this – another side of the coin.
With every try there always comes a win or lose. And the same happens here. And you will play this game with 50 % win and lose.
This failure also gives a temporary feeling of sadness, which results in lower self esteem and self confidence. And at a younger age it is harmful and non-affordable.
Self Satisfaction
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How better it would be if we started proving ourselves to only ourselves. Instead of people.
You know why? Because people change. You never know when a person you follow and want to impress with your actions will change. Will he remain the same for the next 5 years?
Smart people tackle this situation by picking up a purpose. And to fulfill their purpose, they do whatever it takes and find meaning in it.
And satisfy themselves.
