We Are All Suffering

A Buddhist Perspective on Happiness and Fulfillment

Photo by abhijeet gourav on Unsplash

What is happiness? It’s a question that we’ve all asked ourselves at some point in our lives. For most of us, it’s the enjoyment of feelings like pleasure, love, success, excitement, fame, power, and validation.

Our lives revolve around chasing these emotions, from ordering a refreshing happy hour Margarita to getting that salary bump at work. But Buddhism offers a different view on happiness.

Think about the longest you’ve experienced one of the emotions mentioned above.

Maybe it was that time you had an Omakase meal and felt extreme levels of satisfaction throughout the entire experience.

Maybe it was when you went to Hawaii and swam with dolphins, providing a natural high that lasted until you came home.

Or maybe it was when you had a child and felt an unreal sense of fulfillment, but over time, the demands of daily life caused the feeling to fade. Now the child is all grown up and independent and you need to find a new source of meaning in your life.

The truth is, feelings come and go. And according to Buddhism, chasing after these fleeting emotions leaves us in a permanent state of tension, unrest, and discontent.

We follow these feelings, experience them, and then move on. Often, even when we are “happy”, there is still some uneasiness because we worry that the happiness will pass.

So why do we constantly struggle to chase after something that does not last?

This never-ending cycle feels pointless because our minds are never truly satisfied.

According to Buddhism, the situation above is the root of suffering. Instead of a state of constant pursuit, it is key to recognize the nature of our fleeting emotions.

When we stop craving these feelings, we accept them for what they are. They come and go, but we are at peace with our inner selves. Only then can we truly live in the moment and find happiness from within.

Yuval Noah Harari describes it best in his book “Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind”.

“It is like a man standing for decades on the seashore, embracing certain ‘good’ waves and trying to prevent them from disintegrating, while simultaneously pushing back ‘bad’ waves to prevent them from getting near him. Day in, day out, the man stands on the beach, driving himself crazy with this fruitless exercise. Eventually, he sits down on the sand and just allows the waves to come and go as they please. How peaceful!”

- Yuval Noah Harari

So, now that we know that we are all suffering, how do we end it?

Buddhism offers two important concepts: the Four Noble Truths and the Eightfold Path. Understanding these can provide new insights in our lives.

The Four Noble Truths outline the nature of suffering. They are:

1. Dukkha (Truth of Suffering): The first noble truth states that suffering exists in this world. It is inherent in human nature and includes not only physical suffering, but also emotional. These involve pain, aging, disappointment, incompleteness, and anything that causes us to agonize.
2. Samudaya (Cause of Suffering): The second noble truth acknowledges craving/attachment as the cause to suffering. We cling to desirable emotions and stay away from unpleasant ones, but doing so creates more suffering for ourselves.
3. Nirodha (Cessation of Suffering): The third noble truth recognizes that suffering can be overcome and that it is possible to transcend to a state of Nirvana where spiritual enlightenment is reached.
4. Magga (Path to the Cessation of Suffering): The fourth noble truth gives us a set of practices that lead to Nirodha (Cessation of Suffering). This is called the Eightfold Path, a holistic approach to spiritual development that involves all aspects of our lives.

The Eightfold Path outlines the journey to end suffering. Each factor is connected with each other, and viewing it as an integrated system can help us gain a better understanding. Here are ways that we can relate it to our personal lives:

1. Samma Ditti (Right View): Understanding the nature of reality and fleeting emotions can help us appreciate the present moment and find happiness regardless of external circumstances.
2. Samma Sankappa (Right Intention): Letting go of harmful intentions and replacing them with pure ones such as inner peace and compassion can lead to less conflicts within oneself.
3. Samma Vaca (Right Speech): Utilizing our voice in truthful and positive ways while not lying, backbiting, or using abusive language can improve our relationships and create a more positive environment.
4. Samma Kammanta (Right Action): Acting in ethical ways that benefit ourselves and those around us can lead to a sense of purpose and meaning in life beyond just personal success or material possessions.
5. Samma Ajiva (Right Livelihood): Choosing a profession that aligns with our values gives us more satisfaction in our work. If we care deeply about the environment, we should choose a job in sustainability or conservation.
6. Samma Vayama (Right Effort): By consistently putting in effort to cultivate positive qualities within ourselves, such as compassion and gratitude, we can develop a more positive outlook.
7. Samma Sati (Right Mindfulness): Developing mindfulness can help us become more aware of our thoughts and emotions, and develop a greater sense of self-awareness.
8. Samma Samadhi (Right Concentration): By regularly practicing meditation or other concentration techniques, we can cultivate a deeper sense of inner peace and focus.

The Eightfold Path is not one that is sequential and it is important to view it as a whole. For example, Samma Ditti (Right View) involves understanding the reality of suffering which is the foundation of the whole path. Samma Sankappa (Right Intention) encourages pure intentions that aligns with that understanding.

By taking small steps every day, we can bring the teachings of the Eightfold Path into our daily lives and live a life that is aligned with our deepest values and aspirations. This sense of inner peace is unmatched and I truly believe that it is the best way to find happiness.