Self-learning
What changed From Being a Fresh Graduate to a Professional
The 8 lessons I learned in the process
Last week I celebrated my third work anniversary. I had landed on my first job a few months after graduation. Life has taken a different route since then. I have changed from being a clueless graduate to a matured professional … wait, who am I kidding!
I am still very much clueless but not just clueless, also independent! And that’s a successful formula to make mistakes!
I have embarked the journey of self-learning and self-discovery. And on the way, learned a few lessons. These did not come from any self-help books. Well, I have read tons of those, but none stayed.
These lessons are hard-learned through my stupidity…
1. Time is more valuable than money
I always thought all I had to do was make enough money, and the rest would fall into place automatically. I could not have been more wrong. Money gives you security but it can not be a life goal. After having enough to spent on my basic needs, I realised all it can do is give me the things I yearn. But I lost something else on the process of making more money — Time.
You lose time by running behind money
Money can be earned, you can always have more of it if you work smart. But you can never have more time irrespective of how rich and smart you are. Dont waste your time on making money that you do not need. It’s way more precious. When I look back it’s the moments that matter and not the fancy restaurant I went to using my money.
2. Maturity has nothing to do with age
As a young kid, I always admired the old people. They were so wise and I just wanted to be like them. I thought I had to grow as old as they are to gain their level of knowledge. But again, I was wrong.
Mature are the ones who dare to make mistakes and learn from those mistakes.
You can never know what will work and what will not unless you try. I have found travellers to be mature and wise, maybe because they expose themselves to unfavourable conditions all the time. And most of them were in their twenties, not the traditional age to be mature!
You can be as wise as an old person if you are willing to learn from one. That’s all it takes, observe the world around you, be curious and learn.
3. Money is not to be blown away
I had no clue how to handle money once I started making my own. So I spent, spent and then overspent!
The initial idea was to live the best life I could and not care about money. That went pretty well for a while. I could buy whatever fits my budget without a second thought. Life was great, but that did not last.
Soon, I realised that I was just blowing all my money. The overspent money added to the junk I barely use. And increased the number of hours I spent at the gym.
Then I saw people who could better use the money I blew away. The $50 I spent on lipstick can feed a kid. And hunger is a more serious problem than colourless lips! So I started donating instead.
Now I am accountable for my money. I track each penny I earn and save a part of it and then donate before I decide to get fancy.
4. Getting a job is not the end of learning
It’s only the beginning. The first day of my office was difficult. I almost cried on my way back home on the realisation that I knew nothing. And with that realisation came a commitment to learning.
Learning is lifelong. And curiosity only increases with the knowledge you gain. It never feels enough and I know it will never be.
5. Logic first, emotion second
I am a super emotional being. And for me, most questions had the same answer — “It doesn’t feel right!”. Well, that’s a stupid reason, and I never knew the actual reasons behind my actions and behaviours.
This changed drastically once I started working. My work demanded logic. And the same logical thinking got carried to my personal life. Slowly, I started questioning my actions and reasoning with myself. This gave me better reasons, now I can balance out the pros and cons before making decisions rather than saying “It doesn’t feel right!”
6. Own up, do not make excuses
I can no longer blame mom for not waking me up in the morning. She’s just not responsible for it. My life is on me to manage and master.
I can no longer blame my family for the way they raised me, I am allowed to change and improve. And all my failures are my own. I can’t say I do not know something because nobody taught me. That’s just being helpless and irresponsible.
Excuses can not be a part of life. Own up to your mistakes and correct those. You are on your own and you only have yourself to blame and appreciate.
7. Happiness is not external
Yes, it is internal. I was always under the false assumptions that I have to be with the right people and have the right job to be happy. But it turns out, No, I do not have to be. It’s about how I feel about the life I live.
People can add to your happiness but they can not be the source of it
I have spent countless hours crying over people who left. The sole reason? I tied my happiness to them, I felt it was impossible for me to be happy without them. That was barely the truth.
Now I know no matter anyone leaves I will be happy eventually. Happiness is a choice that only you can make for yourself.
8. Hush, don’t hustle
This is the hardest lesson of the lot. I was never in the present, a lot of people told me to slow down, but I would not. I always wanted to finish the task at hand and do the next. I would run from my office back home because I did not want to be late to cook dinner ( not literally, I took metro).
I wanted one task after the other, I was restless and I had a clock of my own running 24*7. I even walked faster than the rest because I felt walking slowly is a waste of time!
Hustling is not all bad, but it takes away the beauty of the present. By constantly focusing on the future, we miss the present moments. Now when I look back, I regret spending a lot of moments worrying about the future instead of enjoying those.
The list can never be complete. I am still learning. I might not be the same person another year down the line. And that’s how it should be.
Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change — Confucius
