What Happened to Me Can Also Happen To You
But don’t worry, I have a solution for that
Sometimes a very common incident can teach you valuable lessons and guide you towards a deep thought worth thinking about.
I can tell you this because I experienced it personally.
What happened was that…
One fine early morning, my friend and I were returning to our homes after a routine running session. On the way home, we were talking about general things like what each of us is doing and what is going on in our lives.
Pause here for a minute…
Before moving forward let me tell you a bit about myself so that you can better understand the story. So, I’m from India and pursuing a bachelor of technology in civil engineering from a regular college like a tier 3 college, not one of those which everybody knows about and dreams of.
That will be enough. Let’s resume.
So, while walking in the cool breeze, I started talking about my college, or I should say I started complaining and criticizing my college — which I was not aware of then and there — about how things have gotten worse after the pandemic, the classes not being regular, the other irregularities, and since the classes are not regular or sometimes not conducted at all, it makes no sense to go to college, it’s a waste of time, and so on. To some extent, I was blaming my college for all of it.
After arriving at home, my mind was still in that state where I was continuously getting thoughts about all that I had said.
While thinking deeply about it, I realized what I did i.e. complain, blame, criticize my college, and that I shouldn’t have done that.
What Did It Teach Me?
Why shouldn’t I have done that?
Because a complaint with no purpose of solving a problem, no purpose of putting efforts to improve any situation is just gossip. And I was doing just that. Such complaints and criticism do no good to anyone nor do they change anything. In fact, they may make the situation worse by filling your mind with excuses for not putting in effort and taking action.
This is why I shouldn’t have done what I did.
Instead, I should always think before speaking. I should be responsible and hold myself accountable for my situations because most of the time what happens with you and what you get is the result of your own actions.
What Did I Realize?
But wait…
I knew this before. I learned this lesson from a great book some time ago. How did I forget it?
Well, whatever be the reason. Eventually, somehow I realized it again. But this doesn’t mean I will always get this chance. I have to do something so that it doesn’t happen again.
At this point, I noted that if this has happened to me it can happen to anybody.
In our lives, as time passes, as we grow old, a lot of changes occur. Change in our behavior, character, body, mentality, attitude, language, lifestyle, interests, thinking, living environment, habits, routine, and so on. And we often seem to forget things as these changes take place.
Think of it like this… if you compare your 5 years old YouTube watch history with today’s watch history, you will see a significant change in your interest in videos.
Sudden changes are noticeable but little ones are hard or impossible to notice and over time these changes can take you to an entirely different path. They can make you a completely different person which you may not like and the fun thing is you won’t even realize or feel the transition.
Now I’m pretty sure like me, you are also wanting to do something about it and take more control over your life.
So for that,
for reminding yourselves of the lessons you learned in the past,
for a reality check,
for finding if you have forgotten something important and doing something you should not do because of that(as I was doing),
for observing where you are going
And for making sure that you don’t get lost in this world of so many different paths,
You should track your thoughts, words, actions, reactions, and overall, your life.
Introspection
Introspection could be a potential solution to this.
Introspect, reflect on yourself every day or every week, have a conversation with yourself, think deeply about what you have done so far and doing right now for whatever it is that you want to accomplish.
Ask yourself, what did you do the whole day or week?
Did you do something you were not supposed to do?
What kinds of words do you use on a daily basis?
What thoughts are dominating your mind? Are they nourishing or toxic for you?
I encourage you to keep a separate notebook for this activity and be honest on those pages. Whenever you feel something is important enough, write it down immediately.
What is your actual direction vs. your desired destiny?
Where do you want to go vs. where you are actually going?
The answers to these questions will bring awareness and show the real picture. So that, you can make better decisions.
Final Thoughts
Changes are not bad but they CAN BE if you are not aware of them, if you are not aware of the transformations happening in yourself. This is the point. Do not lose yourself.
So, this was my personal realization through a very common experience. First I shared it with my friend who was with me at that time. But then I felt I should write a complete article on it. Maybe you will also find it helpful.
Good day.
