What Is The Mystery Of Sex And God-realization?

Ajay Gupta
ILLUMINATION
Published in
6 min readJul 6, 2021

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Photo by aranprime on Unsplash

One of the most common topic of discussions and debates all over the world is, “Does God exist or not? — Can anyone show me God? — Have you seen God? — Is God a mystery? — How does a person benefit by having faith in God?

Atheists deny any existence of God due to lack of proof.

There is a beautiful story of Tulsidas. He was married to a lovely lady named Ratnavali. After marriage, he was obsessed and infatuated with his wife for carnal pleasures. She was constantly in his thoughts all the time, even while he was at work during the day.

At the customary prayer times of the family the mind of Tulsidas will not rest on God, but on the beautiful body of his wife to satisfy his sexual thirst.

His wife Ratnavali was an ardent devotee of Lord Rama. She was greatly disturbed by the fact that even during prayer times; the mind of her husband instead of resting on God was focused on the sexual lust for her body. She considered it as a great mental depravity and perversion of her husband.

One day when Tulsidas had gone out for work, Ratnavali left a letter at home saying that she will be staying at her mother’s house for a few days. When Tulsidas returned home from work, he learnt that his wife had gone to her mother’s home. Tulsidas could not bear separation from her.

He immediately left for his in-law’s house even though a hurricane storm had suddenly built up in the neighbourhood. There was a torrential rain which flooded the streets and uprooted the trees in the vicinity due to strong winds.

Tulsidas had to cross a swollen river on the way to his in-law’s house. With great difficulty he crossed the turbulent river in the pitch dark of the night with the help of a floating object on the river.

After crossing the river, to his utter horror and disgust, he found that the floating object was a dead body which was floating on the river.

With massive struggle and amidst heavy downpour of lashing rains, he finally managed to reach his in-laws’s house at mid-night. Nobody opened the door even after his repeated knocks on the door due to fear of a thief.

In desperation he caught hold of a rope which was hanging from the first floor window of the house and climbed to the bedroom of his wife.

He woke up his wife from deep sleep to give her a surprise. — Ratnavali was stunned and could not believe as to how her husband had reached the first floor bedroom of the house. Tulsidas went to the window to show her the hanging rope which he thought Ratnavali had lowered for him to climb up.

When Ratnavali went to see the rope with the help of a torch light, she found a huge panther snake hanging from the window. Her heart sank and she was in a state of shock.

Ratnavali could not believe that her husband had gone to such an extent of madness to reach her in the raging storm at midnight to satisfy his sexual urge. After all, they were a married couple and he could have waited for a few days to have physical intimacy with her till she returns.

It was insane and utterly mad that her husband had adopted such desperate measures to get hold of a floating dead body to cross the river, and then climb to her first floor bedroom with the help of a hanging snake.

Oh God! What kind of madness was this? — Too much passion in love was like licking honey from the sharp edge of a knife.

Ratnavali thought that it was disgusting to have such a raging lust for a woman’s body. It would be humiliating and shameful if other people came to know of this incident.

She said to her husband, “My body is composed of blood, pus, flesh and bones which give stinking smell if not washed. — I cannot believe that you could not control your sexual urge and came here in the middle of the night unannounced.

You took great risks in the turbulent weather to cross the dangerous river, and it could have been a certain death for you. I am ashamed of you as my husband.

“Instead of me, if you had just half of that love and devotion for God, then you could have easily crossed-over this worldly ocean of illusory Maya. Then, there was a possibility for you to become a great saint and attain immortality with God-realization. My mortal body of a woman’s flesh is subject to decay and death.”

Tulsidas was stung to the heart by hearing such harsh words of his wife. Was he mentally ill and depraved? He was deeply humiliated by his blind lust for his wife. —

What was so special in a woman’s body to make him so mad? Wisdom dawned upon him and he realized that it was just the blind sexual lust of his youth. This was obstructing his path to God-realization.

After this incident, he left home forever and became a renunciate monk to never return back. From that day onwards, he never looked on any woman with sexual lust and desire. His entire sexual energy was transformed into a higher power of celibacy and brahmacharya. —

For him now all women were like a mother figure with the sole function of child bearing only. All worldly attachment and allurement of sex was finished for him for forever.

His entire life was now devoted to sing the glories of God. He later became a renowned saint with a large following of devotees and young women who thronged to hear his soulful devotional songs and bhajans.

He was always immersed in the love of God. — Women took the dust of his feet and applied it on their forehead in veneration as a sacred gift of God.

The big question is… does the desire for sex always lead to suffering or whether the same energy can be transformed into a higher level of consciousness? How does that happen?

The physical indulgence in sexual act will never ultimately satisfy anybody as it will ask for repeat experiences, and the physical body has a limitation.

Any amount of ghee or clarified butter poured into the fire will make the fire to blaze even more. A fire can never be satisfied by more offerings of oblation.

One time indulgence in sexual act can lead to second time and so on, but yet the desire for more still remains…it could be for the next day or next week or next month. —

A person may be eighty years old…..blind and cripple…..one may be physically incapable of indulgence in sex…but if the desire is there… then the fire is still burning and it is not yet extinguished.

The paradox is that with more indulgence in sex; the desire is intensified more and more and further inflamed. — If a person is hungry one can eat a full meal till one can eat no more.

He or she may be satisfied for the time being, but next day the person is hungry again. Similarly food and sex is a recurring biological requirement. Sex works the same way as food but may be the time interval for this hunger is different!

A person may say, “Well, John is a Christian catholic priest and priests do not marry and follow celibacy, so they have no need for sex.” — But if the desire for sex is present, then the priest will also suffer but in a different way like the forced celibacy, and denial of sex.

The householders suffer in different ways through indulgence and body limitations. But the suffering is there in both the cases as long as the desire is not extinguished.

The root cause of suffering is ‘desire’ and not the act of sex itself. The ‘desire’ acts like adding fuel to the fire which is insatiable. Then, how does one extinguish this fire of desire?

Lord Sri Krishna says in God Bhagavad Gita:

“O mighty-armed Arjuna! Thus knowing Self-soul as superior and above the intellect, and restraining the self by the Self-soul; kill this enemy in the form of lust and desire, which is very hard to overcome.”

( Book: Want to Know God: For Young and Old) :https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGBNkk7hH2A

Ajay Gupta is a former Naval officer who served onboard Indian Naval warships and aircraft. — He is the author of two books ‘Word of God Bhagavad Gita’ and ‘Want to Know God: For Young and Old.’

Copyright © Ajay Gupta — Reference book: Amazon: ..Want to Know God For Young and Old : — https: amzn.to/3h0fGiw:https: — -amzn.to/2C7vNfH:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGBNkk7hH2A

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Ajay Gupta
ILLUMINATION

Ajay Gupta is the best selling author of two books ‘Word of God Bhagavad Gita’ and ‘Want to Know God: For Young and Old.’ — His books are available on Amazon.