Preparing for your senior years
When You Should Make Yourself Your Number One Priority
For your good and the good of others
As you approach your fifties you ought to make yourself your Number One Priority. You could stretch it to perhaps 60. But after 60 for sure you need to be your topmost priority.
You may well ask “Priority over what?”
Priority over everybody else … your spouse, your children, your family, extended family, relatives, and friend.
It’s time for your well-being, physical, mental and financial to be of utmost importance to you.
Time to look out for yourself and after yourself! To become self-focused
Why it is paramount to prioritize yourself?
Primarily because if you are healthy, fit, and independent, you are less trouble to others.
And most importantly it is a positive healthy feeling for you to be independent.
What does prioritizing yourself entail?Your Health should be your foremost concern. Annual Medical Check-ups, other routine tests, and intake of prescribed medications are basics.
If the doctor has advised you to come back in 6 months for a test or check-up do it in the 6th month, not in the 8th or 9th month
If your spouse, child, or another caregiver must go with you, ensure they are with you. Or don’t say ‘Oh it is ok. I’m fine, I can wait until your return from your work trip or holiday or whatever else.’
If the doctor has advised you to walk at least 8000 steps daily, make it your priority to walk every day. If not 8000 steps every day at least 5000 to 6000 on average. Everybody else and everything else can wait.
Your Finances — Do not delay a review of your financial position if not already done. You have to take a call if your income, investments, and other financial assets are enough. To live as you would like to. It would be great if you can find new income streams.
Don’t fight shy of taking up part-time or work-from-home jobs. Or monetizing a hobby. They may not bring in a fraction of the salary you were earning. But they will keep you busy. And could bring you some pocket cash for starters.
Also if you are supporting someone financially you need to take a relook at this point. You can stop or reduce the support. This includes adult working children staying with you. You may ask them to contribute from their earnings.
If you are working in an organization don’t let them write you off before your actual retirement. It did happen to me in the company I worked for. I had to take it up with the higher-ups and represent to the HR Department to get some justice
As retirement nears it would be good to check out your post-retirement benefits. In my case, a key benefit was linked to the ‘last salary drawn’. So a lot of us in the lead-up to retirement push for promotions and increments. The last squeeze before we exit!
Your (special) needs — Don’t ignore or postpone making the lifestyle changes you need. Only because it would inconvenience another member of the household. If God forbid you were to fall and injure yourself you would be inconveniencing them more.
My parents had a large bedroom on the first floor of our two-storied house. It was their private space. They had done it up to accommodate their love for books with bookshelves and magazine racks. There was a rather outsized writing table of rosewood. My dad would read and write at this desk, positioned next to the double bed.
As they aged climbing the stairs to the first floor became a problem. They moved downstairs to the sitting room. And took their double bed, bookshelves, writing table, and sewing machine too.
The house itself was over fifty years old. It was impossible to even consider putting in an elevator.
After about 10 years they needed to support themselves as they walked through the rooms. We had horizontal bars fitted into the walls so that they could hold these and walk. Independent of assistance and with confidence. A shower chair, a holding bar all around, and non-slip tiles were all the changes.
Priority over immediate family and extended family — You have reached that stage when you can take only so much discomfort.
No more adjustments at the cost of your comfort!
I have seen not very fit grandmothers babysitting their grandchildren. If you are healthy and have the time, energy, and desire to do so, it’s okay. But if you cannot check any of these boxes you need to tell your child that you can’t do so. They will find other people to take care of their children. Don’t worry about that. It is their problem. As it was yours when you were a young parent.
My husband has a large family and when we visited the family home we would be a large crowd. Sleeping was a stretch with many of us sleeping on the couches or mattresses on the floor. It was fun to stay in one large room and play cards, crack jokes, and chatter late into the night.
Not anymore. We can’t flop down on a mattress on the floor and our bodies don’t curl anymore. Or rather we can do the former, but getting up again is the problem. Using our feet and hands we will have to rise slowly like a four-legged creature!
Now we stay the night at nearby hotels and during the day at the family home. It works best for us and does not inconvenience anybody.
It is time to prioritize indulging yourself- When you have traveled thus far it is time to treat yourself. Just go for it! And please, no more “What will others think?”
Like my sister who wanted to the gym for the first time at 60. The intention was to become fit so that she could travel around the world. She is one of the oldest members at the gym and clocks in regularly. Post-sixty she has traveled extensively including to Antarctica and the Artic!
Or like my neighbour, who after she bought herself a new sedan after both her sons flew the nest to live far away. She engaged a chauffeur as she didn’t drive. She often went to the movies or the mall along with a friend or two. Her outing ended with a meal in a restaurant before heading home.
Last Christmas, a diabetic friend was fretting at Christmas. His grouse was that he couldn’t eat his favorite plum cake at Christmas anymore. I told him that one slice of cake is not going to kill him.
I convinced him by saying “Now more than ever we need to give in to such small indulgences!” I am happy to say that he did buy and eat the cake he wanted to on Christmas day.
The article is I hope a step towards owning and preparing for our senior years.
If you would like to add to this please give your comments in the response section.
