Why Everyone Wants to Be Famous (and why it’s a problem)
You, too, want to be famous, right?
You might feel ashamed to admit it to your friends or anyone you know but at some level, you too want to become famous. It’s not just a few people who want fame, everyone does (most people just don’t admit it.)
Who doesn’t want to have millions of dollars and millions of fans who’d do anything just to get a selfie with you? Who doesn’t want to be known and welcomed by everyone? Who doesn’t want to feel like they’re admired and recognized by strangers?
But there’s a real problem with fame which most people fail to understand. And no, this is not going to be one of those “Why Being Famous Sucks” or “7 Reasons Why You Should Not Chase Fame” articles; instead I will try my best to make you think about this subject critically so that you can hopefully realize why you want fame in the first place — and whether it’s worth it.
What Makes Fame So Desirable
Watching millions of people go crazy over celebrities like Will Smith, Leonardo DiCaprio, Justin Bieber, and Beyonce: it would definitely make everyone want to be famous; getting unconditional love and so many smiles from so many people you don’t even know, getting things for free, being treated better than everyone else, not having to introduce yourself because most people recognize you.
Apparently, famous people seem to get many benefits that everyday people don’t. This makes people believe that life is a lot easier for a famous person, they believe that being famous solves all problems; poverty, neglect, rejection, lack, and so on.
All these benefits make the idea of being famous very appealing to the anonymous one; this is also why most people think they would like to become famous. But there’s something else which plays a bigger role in making fame so attractive and worth fighting for.
The Desire to Feel Wanted and Loved
First, you need to realize that fame is everywhere and that we’ll be talking about fame across different levels; from your manager who is famous throughout your town to Justin Bieber, who is probably even known by your grandma.
Whatever the degree of fame, it does come with its appealing perks, take your manager or director for instance:
- People associate him with power.
- People kiss his ass all day long.
- He clearly has a higher value than you.
- Everyone wants to impress him by taking his side, buying him gifts, celebrating his birthday, offering him help even if he doesn’t want any.
Apparently, all these benefits that fame offers (attention and love) seem very attractive to the people who are either suffering or have suffered from a lack of them.
Whether it’s someone who was neglected by his parents in his childhood, a guy who felt lower in status because his friends around him got more attention and love in school, or that girl who was ignored by the only guy that she loved — neglect is the single biggest culprit that fuels its victims’ desire for fame.
Most people see fame as a way to feel important, to feel loved, appreciated, and recognized by everyone around them.
People also crave fame because they want power, status, and wealth; No one wants to be treated like a nobody, like they’re unimportant, or powerless, and this is why almost every other person wants to become famous; this is what makes fame so desirable.
Fame Addiction
A dog that is denied attention and love is going to have a much worse quality of life than one that is given attention. People are the same way, even many of those who are introverted or misanthropes or self-styled curmudgeon, are subconsciously addicted to attention (fame) at some level.
We all have a deep psychological need, comparable to the need for food and water or for shelter, that is to be approved by people. This is why fame is so attractive, and it’s what fuels everyone’s desire for fame in the first place.
With the growing number of famous Instagram influencers, YouTubers, TikTokers, and the growing ease of access to fame, it makes everyone want their share of it.
Everybody wants some type of fame. Social media is built around this concept; people enjoy their own smaller version of fame on TikTok, Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter. The traditional perception of fame was limited to and associated with only big musicians, politicians, sports stars, and actors — it’s no longer the case now since anyone can use social media to get attention and feel like a celebrity.
When you look at it, fame, for a lot of people, is really just an understandable addiction for constant attention, love, and approval, which is a problem.
Why Fame is More of a Problem Than a Solution
People who fantasize about being famous fail to understand what fame really offers (mere attention); they don’t realize that getting noticed by people does not necessarily mean you’ll be loved or understood by them, which is why everyone one wants to become famous in the first place.
Generally, fame creates more problems that one thinks it can solve. Let’s take all the hate that comes with the attention that fame offers; strangers who don’t have a clue about how one actually is in person will attack him and try to destroy his image. Random people on the internet will state their negative opinions in detail, unable or simply unwilling to imagine that famous people bleed far more quickly than anyone else.
Every worst fear about oneself (that one is stupid, ugly, not worthy of existence) will daily be actively confirmed by strangers. And believe me, the idea of “haters gon hate” is easier said than done, especially when you’re constantly getting hit with a storm of haters who will say and do anything to make people turn against you. Fame does not mean appreciation.
Appreciation and understanding are only available through individuals one knows and cares about, not via groups of a thousand or a million strangers.
Hence, fame creates many unnecessary frustrations that can be avoided at the small price of embracing anonymity.
Should I Give up on the Idea of Fame?
With so many individuals (especially young ones) who see fame as a way to get respect, validation, or love, we need not dismiss the desire to become famous or curse the idea of fame — if we just understand that fame can not and does not offer what’s expected of it (true love and appreciation), we may be able to decide if it’s really worth it.
It might be hard for you to accept and live with the fact that someone other than you is getting so much attention and “love” while you’re not; you may feel less important, worthless or “lower” in the presence of one who is being treated a lot better because of his celebrity, you may feel like you need to do something to make yourself feel more important.
But once you truly understand that fame is neither a solution for neglect nor a shortcut to friendship or love, you’ll hopefully put more effort into the things that actually do matter in life.