Why You Find It Hard to Trust Your Intuition
And why it is a key to your success
Growing up, you were guided by your parents or guardians. They decided everything for you, mostly. They decided what you ate, what time you ate, when you went to bed, which school you attended, and even sometimes what you should do for the rest of your life. Undoubtedly, all of these come from a very good, loving, and informed place. Then you are thrust into adulthood, where you have to rely on yourself for every little and big decision. The little decisions might be relatively easier to make — what to eat, what to wear, when to wake up, how to spend your day, and so on.
The big decisions however can be very difficult especially when there is no clarity. You aren’t particularly sure what you want to study at the university, you are not sure about the career path that interests you, and you are not sure about marrying the person you are dating.
Then people around you start giving you suggestions, they start projecting their fears and insecurities in your life so you feel the best thing is to listen to them because after all, you can’t figure it out yourself.
- Clarity: Clarity is knowing, and being clear about what you want to do or don’t want to do. Because you don’t have clarity, you believe you are not capable of making decisions on your own or you need external validation. Clarity sometimes takes time but time collapses once you are clear about what to do. If you are unsure, don’t look at it as a terrible thing or an affirmation of the fact that you are not capable or you can’t trust your judgment, give it time.
- You see your failures and mistakes as confirmation that you can’t be trusted: because you failed at something, you begin to use that as a yardstick to judge all other situations. Maybe if you had listened to them, things would have turned out differently. Embrace failures and mistakes, when you fail, see it as a learning curve, not something to be ashamed of. Everyone fails and makes mistakes, you are not stupid or the most terrible. When you can embrace mistakes and failures, you make decisions with more confidence instead of fear.
- You are looking for validation by comparing your life with other people’s: this might sound cliché but we are all very unique and our journeys different. No matter how similar it might look, your journey is still different from the people you look up to and there is no other reason than the fact that you are different. How could they give you the blueprint to live your life when they are not you? you might not have all the information you need right now, but certainly, they don’t. you can take lessons from bits and pieces of their life but your power lies in following that slight difference in your path. The slight difference is not what you are doing wrong but the unique thing about you