Member-only story
Why You Think You’re Loved at Home, But May Not
(And How That Lack of Love Spills Into Every Other Part of Your Life)
We underestimate how much our first experience of love — what we felt or didn’t feel at home — sets the tone for everything that follows. It colors the way we handle relationships, how we carry confidence, and even how we define love itself. When home is missing, the absence is not silent; it echoes everywhere.
We often grow up believing we were loved at home. After all, our parents clothed us, fed us, kept a roof over our heads. They corrected us when we misbehaved. They spoke of sacrifice. And so, we convince ourselves: I was loved. I had what mattered.
But love is not the same thing as provision. Love is not obligation. Love is not fear disguised as discipline. Love is not silence where affirmation should have been.
Love at home is supposed to be a safety net. The kind of net that reminds you, even when the world bruises you, you will not shatter because you will always be caught. A place where you can fall without shame. A place where you are believed without having to over-explain. A place where you are guided but not diminished.
When that net is missing, it shows up everywhere else in ways we don’t immediately recognize.
