SELF IMPROVEMENT
You Have to Control Anger before it Controls you
Consequences of this are more crucial than you think.
Back in the day, when I was possessed by anger, things happened to me. And let me tell you, my friend, it surely wasn’t doing any good for me. Anger is a harsh emotional state involving a strong uncomfortable feeling which can cause a very bad reaction to anybody. I just had a bad temper, which was failing me in every field. I was foul-mouthed and was being very indecent to my friends, relatives, and even to my family. I was just getting corrupted inside out. For every single stimulating behavior from someone, I was getting aroused fiercely and was generating an abusive reflex in me. No one wants to be in such kind of situation in their life. The situation was so out of control that I even had to go visit a psychiatrist to get out of this craziness.
Temper is just a mental conflict. But it is not that easy to control/manage it. Some people became mentally retarded dealing with this. I got rejected almost everywhere because of this. There are many types of temper if we look into it, but if we categorize it by its results then it is two types.
- Passive aggression
This a very simple type of anger may you be dealing with every day where you don’t tell anything about but you express it when you get a chance or in some cases not. This can cause very bad for our mental being because we are always looking for that chance to express our wrath. Our emotional chamber will act as a pressure cooker, the build-up of the tiny bits of ire will tend to create a pressure tension inside the chamber. When the tension will be at the peak point, the chamber will burst.
- Active aggression
This is an ultra-intense situation that you might have seen/experienced already. In this case, the person will face an urge to demolish anything to evince his/her aggression. Often some folks could have an altercation with the person in his/her surrounding. This brawl or scuffle can also lead to something very serious such as a violent physical interaction. It can result in ruining your relationship, your reputation, and much more. In some cases, it also serves as a cause of suicide, murder, instability of mind, mental retardedness, etc.
The aggression I have mentioned above is categorized on the basis of the behavior of a person. Both of them had a pretty good grasp of my reflex actions. There are several causes that can tend to aggression. I personally had experienced some of them. Now we can proceed to its absolute causes.
- Opposed by someone
- Interaction with an argumentative person
- Getting Blackmailed
- Not getting the thing that you need
- An incompleteness of a task
- Interference of someone In Personal Bussiness
- Getting insulted (in a public place)
- Ignorance of a person inferior to you
- Study Pressure
- Failure In Career
- Getting agitated/provoked by someone
- Resentment
If you look around, I am 100% sure that you will find more causes of aggression than those are mentioned in the list above. From this list, we can conclude that we will not always be treated as a world-beater. And we will not always be the highest in the room. You have to embrace the aggressiveness inside of you and will also have to hut down the reason which attributes it. The counselor I visited recommended me many techniques to govern my anger. I will now mention some of those techniques and the ones I have developed in the course of rehabilitation.
The Count Down Method
This is an easy formula that sounds very trivial but is effective enough to control your anger at times when the matter gets out of hands. This method suggests that you should count up to 10 whenever you get aroused or get angry. There is also a scientific reason behind it. By counting numbers, your heartbeat slows down, which results in calming you down. Man! this one works like a charm.
Stop Talking
Talking at the time you are aroused can make you foul-mouthed. If nothing, it will operate as a catalyst and will elevate your aggression. This is because talking at that time makes you much angry than you really are. It causes much more argument to the opposing person which attributes to violence and all. If you won't talk at the time, the opposition will also eventually stop and the massacre(more like fist fighting) can really be prevented.
Step Away From There
When you are dealing with an aggressive argument, it is almost impossible to control it. If you know you can’t do that, why shouldn’t we just step away from there? Therefore the most rapid solution is stepping out from there. Now you can go away and feel free to enjoy nature or architecture ( just go wherever you want to). I would suggest you do something interesting like playing a video-game, take a shower, watch videos, read an article and all. As you can see there are several things you can do. It will reduce your aggression at the time.
Initiate a Good Conversation
It is always necessary to keep your mind blissful. A good conversation helps you to soothe your mind. Also, you may have noticed that anger commences with a bad conversation. Our conversation is the reflection of the mind-space that we are in. A good conversation will only radiate good vibes from you.
Practice Yoga
You may have heard about YOGA. This is very beneficial for our body, mind, and soul. Practicing meditation & yoga regularly can impact positively on your body. It will energize us to run errands and will help us to obtain a state of nirvana. Meditation makes you focus on work and diminishes your impulsiveness.
Journaling
Journaling is one of the best methods to forfeit aggressiveness and impulsiveness. This enables you to track all of your itsy-bitsy activities. Like you could mention all of the times you get provoked and get possessed by ire. You could also note why did you get angry at the time and try to come up with a solution to that conundrum. Doing this frequently will make you realize why you get provoked and aroused and will make you work on “The Problem”.
Laugh
It does sound crazy, doesn't it? But it’s a fact. “Laughing is a good exercise”. A good, warm laugh alleviates physical and mental tension and stress, leaving your muscles relaxed for up to 30 minutes after. Actually you can listen to a joke, read comics or see a funny video to laugh at. You may have noticed that when we laugh, we just tend to forget all the other things.
Abstain Hefty Work
The workload can get you bad. It can induce anxiety and stress in you. It will pressurize you with the burden and make you mentally unsettled. The tension build-up from workload will seek a way out from your body. So this is confirmed that you will get provoked and aroused very easily. So you should not push yourself way too much. If you are bound to do it then give it some time and go very smoothly on it.
Just Breathe
Yeah! If you couldn't perform any of the above-mentioned techniques, Just Breathe. A long deep breath has the audacity to help control anxiety attacks, asthma attacks, panic attacks, and much more. Get your control back by just taking a deep breath. If necessary get some water for you.
These are just my mere experiences, some of them might not work for you. Feel free to explore differently for the solutions to this demon named “aggression”. Hunt it down and just slay it like a pro. I know getting control of yourself can be really hard at times, but you are the only person to do that. You can do it, cause I have done it.
