On Balance, by a fellow INFJ.
“You need to seek balance.”
What are we even trying to balance?
[What’s another word for balance?]
To seek balance is quite the popular belief, isn’t it? But what exactly are we looking to balance? Is it a single thing or is it a conglomerate of things? And are we talking about day-to-day responsibilities or is it more about the internal world of the mind and the emotions that accompany it? Unless it’s all of it?
What I believe is implied when people say we should “seek balance” is for everything that is under my control, I should avoid over-doing as much as I should avoid under-doing.
Applying just enough attention to the areas of someone’s life to give them an equal share of my dedication, thus bringing about the result of: “balance”.
[I’m not 100% sure if this is what people mean by seeking “balance”, right now I am just sharing what I believe it is, however, please correct me if I happen to be missing something of importance.]
Let’s say my assumption is a fairly good one.
Why should that [balance] be the aim? Why not instead get really good at one particular thing until I can master it, and then I can move on to the next thing?
After all, didn’t all the brilliant minds do exactly that? Hone in on their unique gift of genius that otherwise would’ve been hindered by trying to find “balance” in other areas of their lives, perhaps even ruining their enormous contributions to humanity.
Sounds silly?
Even though I wish I had a personal testimony to confirm or revoke this, I come to you empty-handed in that regard since I certainly am no genius.
However — if you’re curious enough to follow — I believe geniuses are born; not made. Therefore, whether they seek balance or not, their innate genius would still have made itself known.
Sadly, the gift of genius is not evenly distributed among humans. It is usually a small proportion of the population that’s born with it, some get lucky or happen to be born in the right family, time, or place and their voices were heard, while others fell through the cracks, never getting the attention their genius deserved, except for the notes they might have left behind on their daily journals or the memory of their insights shared with those that appreciated it.
In any case…
I’ve been thinking about “balance” an awful lot lately… and this is what I came up with:
Balance doesn’t mean having an equal portion of “ingredients”, for example, 25% work + 25% health + 25% relationships + 25% self — this scheme is not realistic. What we often see is more like this: 65% work + 5% health + 15% relationships + 15% self. My point is that balance does not mean equality for all. Sometimes a balancing act requires an uneven yet appropriate share of values (or attention).
Balance places that organism in the most opportune environment, so that each component that makes such an organism, increases its chances of not only thriving but reaching its highest potential.
What does this mean — to reach our highest potential? This will depend on what you find highly valuable — after all, we are what we practice.
Every person has their own “highest potential” that they can reach, however, if their values lack [and this was a hard one for me to pinpoint] substance/meaning/stand for a higher good, then this will clearly show in their lives as well.
This does not necessarily mean life will be easy if your values are adequate — not at all.
Life is easy for some and harder for others, there are many components to this such as the luck of the draw — this can most certainly be discouraging or demoralizing after some time… I can understand that… you’ll begin to question your values, the people in your life, and even yourself.
Nevertheless, maintaining balance should remain instead of throwing in the towel.
Humans are not one-dimensional beings.
There is a mind/spirit dimension, health dimension, interpersonal dimension (relationships), creativity dimension, and purpose dimension.
I see these [dimensions] as the building blocks or elements of a healthy human life and each of them is so specific which is why they all require our due attention/dedication because their benefit cannot be drawn from other dimensions.
“The warrior is the twofold way of pen and sword, and he should have a taste for both ways” — The book of the Five Rings, Miyamoto Musashi
In the book of the Five Rings, the author mentions that “there are four ways in which men pass through life: as gentlemen, farmers, artisans, and merchants”. After further reading about those four ways, I believe that it is implied that all of these areas [or crafts] should become a skill the individual should aim to harness so that he can gather the experience to not only apply these in any given situation but also to pass down his wisdom on to others.
When we balance out the different areas of our lives, we become well-rounded, which I believe is necessary if you care enough about others, if you’re planning on living a long and healthy life, or if you want to form a family with the right foundation.
Balance is a skill and a key requirement to achieve any of those previously mentioned but also if you want to maintain them and maintain them WELL; that’s the difference.
Some aspects of our lives weigh more than others, but it is those that need our acknowledgment and care to create the most opportune environment in our lives to increase our chances of reaching our highest potential most efficiently.
