5 Ways This…5 Ways That…. Oh! Shut Up!!
I click on the Medium icon and my feed shows
Seven Ways I Used To Increase My Followers By A Gazillion Times In A Month
Five Ways You Can Earn Up To $100,000 A Day
Or,
Five Ways To Boost Your Income Online So That You Can Fund An Entire Nation
Or,
Ten Tips You Need To Become a NASA Astronaut Because I Have Already Been, And Since I Have To Write Something On Medium Why Not Claim To Be A Master of Everything?
STOP THE MADNESS!!
Using such headlines gets you readers. Fine. But if they are anything like me, they will leave the article in between, bless you with a few adjectives and never return. Following a person who siphons off the emotion out of the article is not an option for me.
Look, everybody knows what is to be done for what. And if not, Google stands tall in all its glory. The least anyone wants is a struggling writer to describe how he made a lucrative amount of money or an article laying out bullets for tricking the readers into thinking you are a valuable writer who needs to be subscribed.
Reading is an exercise that connects you with the emotions of the writer. If an article has bullet points describing what to do, I would rather read a government guideline. I’m not paying for the Medium membership to read up on the mundane, repetitive, over-stretched points.
It’s like the examiner asks to write an essay on ‘goat’, and the student instead states how once a goat was tied to a tree and then goes on to write an essay on the tree.
A lot of times I read such articles and end up gaining no new information. It’s like attending school all over again. Waste of time.
It’s like looking for a good read on the internet when a pop-up comes up saying “Five Supplements To Enlarge Your Wand”. No, Thanks! I don’t want five supplements.
Just one.
I come to Medium to read about the way people think. To read about their experiences. To connect with the fellow Homo sapiens and feel alike.
I don’t care how much money you made. You might as well throw it all away in the pond nearby. Just give me the address before you do that.
But for God’s sake, I don’t want to know your five steps or your fifty shades.
Sincerely, a frustrated reader.
TheUnknownDoktor
