Here’s How I Beat Depression Without Medication or Therapy and How You Can Too
An explanation of 4 tips to beat depression that helped me win and live a better life
This will be a long one, so I’ll keep the intro short.
Depression plagues the modern day. Largely, it’s just due to the lifestyle that is currently forced upon us that goes against our inherent biological coding.
But, like everything, there is a fix.
There is relief and woe in the realization that your depression isn’t a unique experience.
I’ve been there, someone else has been there, and if you’re here, perhaps so have you.
But if it’s something that you are currently battling, then allow me to offer you some guidance as someone who left therapy after being told I had no choice but to take anti-depressants but defeated depression on my own accord.
Slow Your Movements
This might seem a tad strange of a point, but just picture a calm, stress-free life for one moment.
Are your movements going to be rushed?
Would they be panicked?
Would you be pacing down hallways, huffing and puffing, as you struggle to keep to your frantic pace whilst your mind has zero time to catch up?
No, of course not.
Now, I recognize this might seem like very weird advice but trust me, live your life slower.
A part of your internal discourse — your depression, might be due to how much you want out of life now and how fast you want it, but obviously, impossibly cannot get it.
On the flip side, it could also be due to the fact your internal woes and angst propel these frantic, quick movements out of troubled panic and anxiety-stricken lows.
Slow down. Allow your mind and body to process things.
It doesn’t mean getting lazy, of course not.
Simply living life through less of a rush by allowing time to pass, process, and understand will bring about a collective understanding of your current actions, situation, needs, and wants without clouding it up in the messy cauldron our minds can be.
By slowing down, you also slow your breathing.
You know the breathing techniques that vary from inhaling for a period of time, pausing, and then exhaling for that same period, right?
Well, instead of making a conscious effort to allot time in your day to practice this, make a conscious effort to do this every second of every day.
Just take long, deep inhales and slow your breathing.
If you slow your breathing, you slow your mind. No panicked person who breathes rapidly and shallowly has ever gained the peaceful consciousness of a Buddhist monk, have they?
So, slow your actions. Slow your breathing. Allow yourself to become engulfed in the passing of life. Depression has a habit of taking us away from life because we’re so caught up in what happens internally that we never recognize what happens externally.
Learn to pilot your body in a way that brings tranquility and prosperity.
Don’t freehand the controls and not focus on what you’re doing because then you will bring upon exactly what your woes are about discomfort, chaos, disorder, and most importantly, lostness and hopelessness.
Easy, Accomplishable Habits
You always want to have habits that you incorporate into your day-to-day that aren’t arduous and that require little effort, but once you complete them, make you feel as if you’ve achieved something.
In part, you would have. You either bettered the environment around you or didn’t delay one of your responsibilities.
When setting out these habits, you want structure, too — life without structure is basically a free-falling elevator.
So, when I was depressed, it was the little things that counted.
In the morning I;
- Made my bed
- Did a few stretches
- Brushed and washed
Making your bed is essential because you kickstart your day by tidying and making the environment around you neater, but it prepares you for sleep in the evening.
Stretches will open your airways and muscles, allowing you not to start lethargic as you get a small energy boost from allowing your still body that’s been sleeping through the night to become reinvigorated.
Lastly, it’s easy to not take care of yourself when depressed. I know I didn’t. So please, make sure you brush your teeth and adopt a healthy skincare routine. You’ll feel rejuvenated, more confident, and better about yourself.
In the afternoon I;
- Worked out
- Walked
- Drank 1L of Water
Working out is great for you. Really, nothing more needs to be said, as the physical and psychological benefits are too much to list here. However, if you’re angsty, angry, upset, bothered, etc., then working out can clear your mind. You’re actively bettering yourself whilst putting that negative energy toward something better for fuel.
Nature is healing. Walking is tremendous for you as it’s low-effort cardio, and you get in touch with life — the real world. What goes on inside your head is largely imagination. Get grounded, and get connected with the wonders of life. Allow yourself to become present.
Lastly, by the afternoon, I had drank 1L (liter) of water. Water wakes you up. It’s fulfilling and it energizes you. Your entire body is mostly made up of water so don’t be neglecting your body’s inherent need for water. Skip the fizzy drinks, skip the energy drinks — water is all you need.
In the evening I;
- Practiced Gratitude
- Cooked Dinner
- Washed up
Gratitude is essential. Of course, you’ll be upset, lost, and hopeless if you give yourself no reason to be happy, found, and optimistic. You live every day taking for granted a resource someone out there in the world lacks. Start being grateful for your position, it’ll make you more comfortable with your current situation.
Cooking dinner is a great one because I did something for myself, you know? Largely, all of this is for me, and it would be for you, too, if you adopt these. But, having control of something when life felt out of control was a soothing, meditative feeling.
Washing up or cleaning the dishes is simple, but I bet you put it off like I used to. The mess amalgamates, and then boom, there’s clutter everywhere. We regret putting it off, but it’s already so messy; why tidy it if it’ll be messy again, right? That’s your mental state right now, unironically. It’s representative of that. So, if you want change, clean your mess for me, yeah?
I’ll have an article dedicated to the importance of habits and how to navigate them soon, but as a whole, habits are crucial. They shape your routine, and when I was depressed, my routine was to wake up, wallow, freehand life, and sleep.
The adoption of habits helped me immensely, and it’ll help you too.
Make Your Problem Adaptive
When I was depressed, I found myself remarking on the fact I was lost and had no purpose.
An adaptive problem is one that wouldn’t have one solution.
The reason why I say to make your problem adaptive is when you’re already hopeless, you don’t want to rely on that one solution in case it doesn’t work. It’ll just make you even more hopeless.
So, when I marinated in the fact I had no purpose — which contributed to my depression — I had to have systematic solutions in place.
My systematic solution was this:
- Explore my interests; whatever flows naturally and piques satisfaction, I should chase.
I dwindled on the idea of writing for so long, but I kind of got burnt out. I took up arts, clay molding, scriptwriting, mixology, etc. It wasn’t until the very end of 2019 that I actually discovered that writing is my passion, a craft I want to develop.
- Develop my person
You need to develop yourself. You have no idea the extent of your being unless you understand yourself, which you cannot do without development.
So, I developed every single aspect. For my mind, I resorted to journalling, meditation, and reflection. For my body, I improved my overall health, became more active, and started weightlifting.
It was within those aspects that I improved my perspective of life. I realized I had the willpower and drive after seeing results from my working out. I discovered my ability to handle challenging situations had improved remarkably after understanding my own emotions.
I had developed. I had grown.
- Fill in the gaps
So, once all of that was done, I realized my purpose involved writing, and now I believe it involves guidance, and I developed my person… what is left?
Well, to fill in the gaps.
I had no money, so I needed a job. I lacked the ability to provide for those I cared about, so I became more charitable. I can’t drive and have that freedom, so now, I am learning to drive.
Whatever it is weighing you down, do not rely on one solution. Your problem may take multiple solutions. It’s important to develop a system that is flexible enough that if a solution doesn’t work, then well, there’s always another avenue forward.
What You Are Doesn’t Matter. What Is Left After You Does.
The problems that surround you will fade away much like your body will long after its time.
The problems that are to my being, the problems of Alex Robinson, will fade away when I’m gone.
There’s… a chilling, bittersweet relief to that realization.
But, just because the problems disappear when you do, doesn’t mean if you eject early, you won’t cause mass hysteria and problems in your wake.
I think you know the subject I’m talking about without even explicitly saying it.
In 2018, I nearly ejected out of life early. I had everything set up to take my own life. But something stopped me.
I’m not superstitious or anything, but this force stopped me. I was in no right of mind to have taken me out of that situation, but I remember feeling warm, like someone had hugged me. Images of my family came over me, and I packed it all away and rushed up to bed. I sobbed into my pillow.
The one thought on my mind was… “How could I?”
It frightens me that I was within mere inches of removing myself from my loved ones. I would’ve stolen a son from my parents. A brother from my siblings. A friend from my friends.
For the rest of their lives, they would mourn. They would torture themselves, figuring out the why to my own arguably selfish decision.
I was not going to let them blame themselves for me.
Something that day changed the gears in my head. I asked myself one simple question a week after, “What would be left worthy to remember me by?”
Problems are just that. Problems.
They come and they go like the guaranteed passing of time.
But what isn’t guaranteed is the kind of legacy you leave behind. The kind of change you stood for. The kind of lineage that would follow you. Not if you don’t allow yourself to grow. To develop. To encourage. To understand. To take risk. To take life by the scruff of its hair and say, “No, I’m doing things my way. I’m doing this because I’m passionate, and I believe in it and myself.”
You are loved.
You are cared for.
The most dangerous part of depression, especially if you end up in the state I was in, is assuming you aren’t.
Because you rip away the ability for people to love and care for you, and you only allow them confusion and torment.
Techniques and The Little Things
Just to end things off, as per usual now, I’ll spontaneously throw in an extra point to those who take precious time out of their days to read what I write.
Here, I’ll outline and detail some of the fundamentals that I used and still use to this day that helped me get of depression.
Clean Your Bedroom
Why? Well, not only because, at some point did, your mum tell you to, but because your environment reflects your current mental well-being.
Your bedroom will be the most comforting place on Earth because it is where you sleep, relax, and wake up.
If your safe space is a mess, so too will your mind.
If you relax in the same environment that is as chaotic and senseless as your mind, then you will only know those things and the connotations of such regards.
When I treated my bedroom like an extension of my mind, I was no longer in ruts of hopelessness, despair, and chaos. So, whenever I was feeling lost, I cleaned my room. I reorganized it: boom — mental clarity achieved.
Say Hi To Your Neighbour
Humans are innately social creatures. We are hardwired to be social.
Unfortunately, the current modern-day disables most people from interacting socially. And no, social media does not count.
Lack of genuine human connection is what contributes to the feeling of no one supposedly caring about you and the general loneliness you might be facing.
When you go out for your walks, when you pass by, just give a little smile or even a nod if you can’t muster the courage to say good morning, good afternoon, etc.
That split second you interact with somebody else can take you out of your own head. You’ll be experiencing life in the moment, and that is largely the trouble when you’re depressed; you’re too fixated on past regrets and future anxieties.
Think About Now
Touch grass, stare at the sky, clench an object, speak to someone — all these things can make you present.
If you aren’t present, you’re lost.
You can’t go back in time to fix things, so why are you trying to put yourself back there?
You can’t go forward in time to face the hypothetical situation in your head, so why are you trying to put yourself there when it may not even happen?
You need to do anything you can to become present.
The only time where you can actually fix and change something is now. Literally, right now. Not the seconds that happened and are now gone as you read this, but literally, utterly, now.
Whenever you catch yourself drifting back to the past or racing ahead to the future, do anything above to make yourself present. Just focus on what is literally around you. Touch something, feel the sensations. Get out of your mental prison.
Phew… this was a long one, hey?
I could keep going, truth be told.
In fact, what I will do for you is I’ll create a Reading List, which hopefully you can have access to, that will outline the road out of depression and anxiety and lead you to a better, fulfilling life.
But please, no matter how drastic your depression or anxiety may be, do not do anything drastic.
Recognize your thoughts and feelings. Develop a system to power on through them and to fix your current situation. Think about what you can do now. Think about your aspirations.
There was a younger you at one point who dreamed big and bold. Do the little guy or girl a favour and accomplish the best out of life for them, yeah?
I believe in you. You’ve got this and you are far, far from alone.
Thank you for reading.
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