The Power of Saying No: Mastering the Art of Prioritization and Avoiding Overwhelm
The Overloaded Student
We’ve all been there before — feeling completely overwhelmed by the sheer amount of commitments and tasks on our plate. As a 19-year-old university student, I constantly struggled with taking on too much and then crashing under the weight of it all.
Between a full course load, part-time job, social obligations, and attempting to keep some semblance of a personal life, I often ended up exhausted, anxious, and feeling like a failure. The never-ending to-do list taunted me no matter how hard I tried to power through.
Sound familiar? If so, you’re not alone. Many of us, especially ambitious young people, have a hard time saying no. We overestimate our capacity and underestimate the consequences to our mental health and well-being.
The Importance of Prioritization
I had to learn an essential life lesson the hard way — mastering the art of prioritization. I wish someone had told me earlier on that saying yes to everything leads nowhere good. I’d end up half-assing many commitments or dropping some altogether.
As Stephen Covey wisely stated:
“Most of us spend too much time on what is urgent and not enough time on what is important.”
What I realized is that every time I said yes to something, I was also saying no to something else. My time and energy resources were limited, after all.
By constantly overwhelmed by everything vying for my attention, I lacked intentionality about what I wanted to focus on. Without proper prioritization, I let the tyranny of the urgent rule my life.
The Power of Saying No
Learning to say no when my plate was already full took practice and getting comfortable with some discomfort. After all, disappointing people or turning down opportunities outside my comfort zone.
However, I discovered that saying no wasn’t selfish — it was self care. Guarding my time and energy allowed me to show up as my best self for the people and priorities that mattered most.
It prevented that dreaded burnout crash and allowed me to approach commitments from a place of abundance rather than scarcity.
Here are a few key mindset shifts that helped me get better at the art of saying no:
1. Set clear priorities
Get crystal clear on your top priorities — whether it’s academics, health, relationships, personal growth, etc. Use these as filtering criteria when requests come your way. Will saying yes contribute toward or detract from these priorities?
2. Know your capacity
Getting to know your mental, emotional, physical, financial capacity takes time. But understanding your limits helps prevent overextending yourself. Track your time and energy levels. How much bandwidth do you truly have available?
3. Practice self-compassion
Learning to say no used to trigger intense guilt and anxiety for me when letting someone down. Give yourself permission to set healthy boundaries without self-judgment. You can only operate from your own capacity — and that’s okay.
4. Start small
Gently push your comfort zone instead of expecting overnight change. Say no to one low-priority commitment per week. Build enough evidence that guarding your time and energy leaves you feeling less overwhelmed.
5. Communicate conflicts
Rather than commit and flake, be upfront when invited to something you realistically can’t make space for. “I’d love to join book club, but my schedule is pretty packed right now between school and work. Could I take a raincheck?”
Mastering When to Say Yes
Along with learning to say no, I also had to learn discernment about when to say yes. After all, I still wanted to take advantage of cool opportunities outside my comfort zone.
Again, checking back in with my priorities acted as the litmus test. Did saying yes give me energy and excitement or drain me? Did it align with my academic and personal goals?
Practicing the art of prioritization meant embracing his Taoist quote:
“If you say yes to everything you essentially say no to anything.”
Final Thoughts
If you resonate with my struggles as an overwhelmed student who couldn’t say no, take heart. Start small and practice guarding your time and energy. Mastering the art of prioritization allows us to operate from a place of intention and abundance rather than scarcity and frustration.
Saying no takes courage, compassion, and cutting ourselves some slack. But nothing worthwhile comes without some discomfort. And the personal growth we experience when learning to set healthy boundaries pays dividends.
What has your experience been with setting boundaries and saying no? What challenges arise? Share your insights by commenting below!
Checkout my other stories :
